Day 37 of the lockdown

Day 43. Weird sa din. I don’t know if I want to call it a good one. Or a disastrous one. So much happened in the world that is important to me (of course there is this grandness in which I am not even a speck of dust on the infinite timeline that we don’t know about). So, lemme try and talk about those. You know, like dear diary. 

So, here we are…

Since the lockdown started, I have subjected myself to lo-carb food. That means I was eating a lot of pastels – eggs, paneer, tofu, dahi, and other things like that. The premise was that I don’t want to come out of the lockdown looking like a 50-year-old version of me. You know how big an ageist I am. No? 

So I tried to eat “well” and it was well till it lasted. I could’ve gone longer but I was losing motivation with each passing day – I mean I had stopped losing weight and I was actually feeling lazy and lethargic all the time. May be it because that damned AC would not work and I won’t get good sleep? 

Anyhow, so at a whim, last night I decided that I would do a 3-day water-only fast. And it went well for exactly 4 hours after I woke up. And I ended up ordering a Gobhi Parantha. And Rajma Chawal. And yes I ate all of that in like one go. Of course along with re-runs of Taarak Bhai. And I write this, around midnight, I have had this bread-omelet and there is a Maggi that is waiting for me to gobble it up. 

No, I can’t say I felt great about all the carbs that I stuffed myself with. No, I can’t say I feel shitty from the inside (now that my gut is lined up with gully ka tel and I don’t know what quality of rice / Rajma). It’s just a fact worth noting. 

The point of this longish rant? 

40 days of clean eating does NOT help you lose weight! 

At least, it did not help me. 

So that. 

The other that happened today was that the Podium went live on Apple Podcasts. Check it out here. AD and I have been at it since Dec last year. And it finally took so much effort and energy and money to finally get it up. Now the plan is to ramp it up. This is all the more special because after C4E this is the thing where I am attaching my name to. I mean I am as attached to TRS and PPP as Shiks and Prak are attached respectively (and like all the other entrepreneurs I partner with). But Podium is where my whims and my ideas about things will be pushed. The success or failure of the Podium will be my doing. And AD’s. But he is generally supportive of what I do. So that! Oh, thanks are in order for the young team at Podium that is making this happen. 

The other thing that I have been doing lately is that every day at around 6, I take this mini-break from whatever I am doing. Get myself a coffee and something to munch on and sit at this window and stare blankly at the calmness around. And think about things that I cant recall. Matlab meditative trance ;P

Of course, this would be shortlived. Once the lockdown is lifted, the quiet road would turn into this mini-highway where everyone (even the ones without cars) is honking and all that. 

But I like this idea of a quiet moment in the middle of the day. Years ago Guru would tell me that he takes a break every day to go see the sunset from the nearest beach (he lived in Goa back then and I would go all the way there to meet him). Inspired by him, I promise that will find a place where I could have a quiet moment away from humdrum. Around the sunset. And pause. I guess this is why people smoke? A friend says they don’t. I say, they do! What do you think? Do lemme know. I’d love to prove a point to her. 

The last thing that I want to write about is Irrfan. The actor. Though I was not a fan per se and I can’t say I have seen his work but I do remember bits and pieces of Namesake and a lot of things from Haasil. He passed away today and like any celebrity, he got the entire world grieving. And like someone said on twitter, his passing on seems very very personal to a large large number of people. It seems everyone I know has lost a close friend, a confidant at work, a role model that they looked up to, an epitome of talent, and a product of disciplined hard work. I don’t think a lot of people induce such deep reactions from as many people as Irrfan did. And not one has had any trace of negativity! Says a lot about the man!  

I don’t know what I could say that’s not been said already. I hope he rests in peace and the ones missing him find closure. 

Brings me to another point. The inevitability of it all. And the shortness of time. And the lesson that I take from each such incident. He was 54 and he apparently had a lot of time up ahead and he was doing great work. And yet he is gone. To never come back. Reinforces that in this random and unpredictable life, the time to do things is now. Patience and “in due time” is not for me. I can not slack! I know this is not the kindest thing to say but I sincerely hope I am reminded of this rude fact often. So that I stop slacking. And do some great work that inspires others to chase their greatness. What else is the meaning of life otherwise? 

Phew! And that’s it for the day!