So, as I write this, I am living the American dream. As American as they come. The dreams I mean.
I am as free. Free like a free man at the start… shut up, Mr. Garg.
Thing is, I have no place to go back home to. I am in a car and I am living literally in it. And to make matters more American, the car is borrowed. Beat that fellas!
I had to vacate the house I lived in (for the last two years) and the place that I am supposed to move in is not mine yet. And wont be. For the next 15 odd days. And thus, all that I owned (for all the claims that I make about living an austere and minimalist life, it was 25 boxes) has been sent to storage. Barring one laptop bag, one overnighter (that has one pair of denims, a couple of shorts, three shirts and as many tees) and one vanity kit (yes I do have one). These three things allow me to live on the road for about a month.
This would be, I think, the 7th time I am changing the house in Mumbai in the last 4-5 years since I’ve been here (Ashok to Zara to Zinnia to Peter to Wadhwa). 6th.
Funny thing is that this was the first time I was even remotely emotional about leaving a place behind. I am actually sad about leaving it behind.
I am not sure what made me so attached to the place.
Was it the fact that this was the first time when I was living by myself?
Or was it the view from the balcony? You know those expansive shots of Godrej and beyond? Wait. Balcony!!!
Or may it was because I was living next to Myra?
I dont know. But what I do know is that I miss the house. And I will miss it for a few days. Unless the next one is so grand and so amazing that I forget this one. Which I know is probably not going to be the case – the new one is smaller and there is no balcony to stand in and stare in the infinity.
I have no clue why builders in Mumbai dont do balconies. And I dont know why people in Mumbai dont ask for one and settle for less! Probably because space is at so much premium that people get stuck in whatever is offered to them? We’d never know.
But then, like everyone, I want to claim that I am different. I want to demand it all. Even if I am unreasonable. Here’s what most people ought to do when they look for a house in Mumbai. For the ease of reading, am breaking this into a 101.
Step 1.
You look at your pocket. Understand the budget.
Step 2.
Then you try to look at the kind of space you need.
Step 3.
Then you do that math. What part of Mumbai will offer me the kind of space I want for the amount of money I have.
Oh, I missed the most important component. Where do you want to live. I know of people who have decided to not set a foot out of Bandra. There are some that do not cross Mahim. There are some who are ok living in the jungles of Kandivali or Bhandup for the kind of space their budget allows them to. Then there are people like me. Who want the best of everything. Large space. Balcony. Proximity to a Starbucks. Accessibility to various hubs – cultural (Bandra), writing (Andheri), startups (Powai) et al.
So, step 4.
You put all the variables together. Find a place that gives you all the things you need. You want. And then you tell everyone you know or dont know that you want a place.
Step 5.
Go pray at whoever God you have your faith in. I mean this is that stage where you need Dua more than you need Dawa.
Step 6.
You prepare for all the gut-wrenching questions that people would ask you. Did you read my last post?
Step 7.
When you do get humiliated enough and find a house, you grab it both your hands. Even if the house will be made available to you after a month! And if its getting available in a few days, ensure you have a car!
So after these 7 steps, in all probability you would have a house. If you dont, fuck the golden opportunity that you are sitting on, ignore that and go back to your gaon. I would’ve done that if I dint get a house. I was thiiiis close to doing that. No shit, bro. I was. Just then I got the place and the only compromise seemed to be getting the possession after 15-odd days. And I snapped it up! And that’s how I landed in the middle of the American Dream!
I’d talk more but I have an important thing to do. Find a place to crash for the night!
Till next time, over and out.