Being Indian

Conversation with myself, on Ajmal Kasab

Today, I woke up to the news of Ajmal Kasab’s execution. And to be honest, I was indifferent towards it. Ofcourse there was this curiosity to know more about it. Ajmal Kasab and his case has to be the most famous case in the country – for what he did was amongst the worst a human can do to another humans. I woke up and read about it and despite all the witty, sarcastic, patriotic, inflammatory and useless comments about it, I remained indifferent. Probably its the classic case of “not my problem”. Or may be like most other things, I grew so tired of all the debate and discussions around it that I had shut my head to anything about it. Or may be its plain, good old indifference?

I dont know. And I cant seem to find an answer. Apart from the indifference about it, the execution has left me with conflicting thoughts to be honest. On one hand, I dont support capital punishment and on the other, I want the guilty (especially of the attack) to be punished. I appreciated the way the Govt. handled the entire issue and at the same time I ~~loathed~~ hated all the rejoicing that was going around. End of the day he was a human being and its barbaric as a society to celebrate someone else’s killing. But like someone pointed on twitter, our biggest festival is all about victory of good over evil by killing of the Ravana and making him pay for his misdeeds.

There are no easy answers to this debate. More than taking a side and answering anyone else, I am struggling really hard to be to true to myself and find answers. I am hating all this uncertainty and indecisiveness. I actually revel in uncertainty and celebrate freedom that comes with it. Though my fickle mindedness is legendary, I am not undeceive at all. I hate waiting for decisions. In fact I take fast decisions. And I take so many of those (is this why I am fickle minded?) that it at times is a blur. More food for thought.

You know (who am I talking to by the way? Myself?) I was actually in Mumbai when the attacks happened. I was tucked away in one remote corner when Kasab and his gang went about firing and killing innocent civilians. To be honest, I was not afraid, even for a minute. I think because I dont really know what terminal danger looks like. And I am the kinds who believes that nothing that is an outlier, could happen to me (including stoke of extraordinary luck). But then since I consume so much media, I could sense the anger, pain, frustration and helplessness in the ordinary Indian.

Is the execution of Kasab an answer to these emotions? I sincerely hope it is. Hate to see so much potential being squandered away over fruitless discussions and mental orgasm. As a capitalist, I cant really understand where do people get the time to practise religion. There is so much to do and so much to achieve and yet people tend to waste their time. Every day is a new day. Why cant we get up and live each day to the fullest?

I hope that the ones who lost their loved ones in the entire episode have found some kind of closure. That to be is the only good thing about this execution. Hope they sleep better now. Hope they wake up tomorrow with renewed vigour and enjoy all the blessings that Mother Earth has showered on us. The world is indeed beautiful out there.

Happy Independence Day

Credits: Wikipedia

~~Tomorrow~~ Today we, the people of India, celebrate our Independence Day. It was 15th August in 1947 when we got free from the clutches of British rule. We are now a 66 year adolescent kid. Old enough to take our own decisions and yet young enough to not commit to those. Old enough to talk magnanimous things and yet young enough to not fathom the outcomes. Old enough to dare to do great things and yet young enough to hold on to things like castes and egos.

I think its time that our collective conscious needs to take a call and either come out as young or as mature. And this call has to happen now. We can no longer hide behind the tag of developing nation. We are more than a billion and we need to take charge now. At least I need to!

As I write this, I realize that I am damn lucky to have born in a free India. Not really the most ideal outcome of the ovarian lottery but I cant complain about where I ended up. I have inherited the quintessential Indian values, culture, norms and yet I have the desire to chase the Great American Dream (no, not move to US of A but chase the tenets of the american dream – opportunity for prosperity and success). There are these two worlds that tear me apart. On one side is my societal performance where I am constantly evaluated for being the obedient son, caring brother, moral citizen and trustworthy friend. Its a life that I live for others around me. And I am not sure if I am comfortable with it. On the other side is what motivates me from within, where I see myself as someone who takes risks, does things that he wants to do, follows those hunches that often end up as wild goose chases. A life that I would have scripted by myself. I am not sure if I have the balls to chase it but in an ideal world, the two would co-exist in harmony.

This dichotomy, is not merely restricted to myself as an individual. Its larger than that. On one hand, I want to be proud of the ability to take breath in free air without any fear of anyone. And on the other, its stifling to be just another unimportant cog in the giant machinery that runs the country. I want to believe that my vote counts but I am not sure it does. Hell, I dont even have great people to vote for. I want to make a difference but I am not too sure where to start from. Come to think of it, after all these years, the Independence Day has reduced to being just another holiday when busy people like me can catch up on all those long overdue errands. For others, it may mean a day to catch up on sleep. For our schools, it means unfurling our Tiranga by the principal. For the TV channels, it means they can re-run movies like Karma, Mother India etc. For News channels, it means special programming, debates etc around sacrifices that can get them most TRPs. For politicians it means yet another opportunity to speak up and get noticed. For me, it is yet another day when I must write something or the other that makes me happy.

Guess this piece is more inspired by my state of mind rather than anything else. But anyways, while trying to talk about the trivialities, we seem to have missed a very very important thing. Its actually a question. The same one that Sahir Ludhyanvi first asked in 1957 (text, vid). Jinhe naaz hai hind par, wo kahan hai?

Dear Rich Housewives

Dear Rich Housewives,

On behalf of all the drivers that drive you around the town, the restaurants that host your kitty parties, the high street malls that you frequent to buy groceries, the maids that to help you with cooking, cleaning etc, the beauty parlors where you paste tons of creams and powders on your faces and millions of such micro-economies that you help flourish by your mere existence, including the one I am a part of, a BIG THANK YOU! Thank you so much for your patronage. We have no clue what would we do without you guys. You actually provide for food and shelter for me and my family.

Thank you so very much!

Regards,
SG

And now that letter is over, lemme come to the reason for this letter. But before other things, let me describe you. A typical rich housewife. For the ease of readability, lemme use bullet points.

A typical rich housewife is in her early thirties (because the number that us minions call age, stops increasing for rich housewives after they are 35), has her personal ~~driver~~ chauffeur to ferry her around the beauty parlors, malls, kitty parties and other social gathering that attracts her kinds.
She has a very active social circle of friends, neighbors, few almost page 3 celebrities, people who own fancy restaurants and parlours and the likes.
And of course ~~relatives~~ in-laws that she loves to hate.
The creature called husband is a fast rising star in some large multinational and thus only meets her on Sunday morning brunches at famous five star hotels.
Sex is strictly twice a week, lasting for all of five minutes on each occasion. Not necessarily with the creature that we spoke about two seconds back. Variety, you see, ensures that there’s “spice” in life.
Money needless to say, is not a problem. She holds a credit card with an insane credit limit. Thanks to all the hard work that the husband puts in at work.

But you may ask that most women, in Delhi atleast, have at least two things from the list I spoke about above. How are you to spot the real rich housewife? Here’s a checklist…

She would be wearing thick framed sunglasses. Even when she is inside a mall. And even if its night. I suspect they dont remove the sunglasses even in the movie halls but I am not too sure. I havent had any rendezvous with any so far.
She can be found body hugging wearing track pants in all sorts of “interesting” colors like powder pink, baby pink, parrot green, turquoise, blood red and shimmering black. Shimmering is the keyword here.
When she sits in her chauffeur driven cars, she would sit right behind the chauffeur. Men and other mortals sit diagonally behind the chauffeur. But not her. Her throne is right behind the driver. I dont know why. I wish I could know.
She would have a really badly dressed maid in traditional Indian clothes, trialing her. The maid’s hands would be full of large shopping bags. On lat count, she had paper bags from a million and a half trees.

Enough. Now I have to come to the real reason of this letter/post. Its about a friend. She just got married to a guy who is a typical rich housewives’ husband. And she is kinda lost about her purpose in life. She thinks that since she is no longer a girl now and married to a dude, she is now worthless and does not deserve to live etc.

The letter is strictly to give her affirmation her that she is not worthless. She must know that she is as important to our lives as Mamta Didi or BehenJi Mayawati are. She provides livelihood and entertainment to so many people. She is better than those godmen. I mean a typical rich housewife directly employees at least 12 people and indirectly supports 60 mouths. She should be damn proud of her existence. And I am not even talking about all the pseudo
businesses that she runs (just to enter the “me too” list). If I included that, I wouldn’t be surprised if 80% of India’s GDP is somehow touched by the rich housewife!

xxx, just take care of yourself. You are really important. I mean it.

P.S.: I sincerely apologize if I may have hurt any feelings.
And obviously, any similarity with anyone living or dead, is purely
coincidental.