#inNextLife

3 #lifeLessons (for people in their 20s)

So I dint get up on time today. I think it was way past 8:30 when I woke. For the context, I try to be up by 430 – which I rarely manage. And because I was late to get up and today was my manager day, I had to be at work. And to be able to reach on time I had to take public transport (aka Mumbai Metro).

Which I did.

And that was a good thing and a bad thing.

Bad that I had to travel in a compartment that was full of people who probably belong to the cult that does not believe in taking showers. You know how they are? Happy with each others BO? Plus, for them, I think traveling in the Metro is a sport. After all they have this uncanny knack of stomping on your feet even if you are the only person in the entire train. And they can spot a speck of space from a mile that can squeeze their frame of a 1000 kilos and 300 KMs in that speck. And they rush to it. Only to realise that the other person in competition is 3000 kilos!

Good that I got a session of HIIT done. I mean what else do you call the excursion in the Mumbai Metro where every other person reeks of I dont know what and is adamant on crushing your feet? And like every HIIT regimen, there is enough heat (thats to a million bodies packed together in a space meant for a handful) that you sweat all the fat out!

Oh when you get out of the Metro, the rickshaw guys? They will ensure that you continue the work out by refusing to go where you have to.

Apart from this, I attended a shoot for a music video. Done at EXTREMELY low budgets. And thus, a million lessons. And that’s what I will talk about in the next section – lesson of the day!

And what did I learn today?
So I learnt how to do a cheap film.

And apart from that I learnt the following three lessons. You can also read these as three life lessons for people in their 20s, if they wish to have a better life!

A. You need to have a talent that you can monetise.
You need to learn it as soon as possible.

At 35, its impossible for me to learn a new thing. But if you are in your 20s, PLEASE go learn a skill that you can monetise. Paint, draw, sing, play an instrument, code, learn magic, dance, do something that allows you to not depend on traditional sources of income.

B. You need to do things that scale. And compound.
For example, if I manage operations at a company, what I do there, doesnt scale. On the other hand, if I create a book, if its good, I can earn royalties for the rest of my life.

So between trying to make ends meet by working on a safe job and doing something that can potentially give you money for the rest of your life, I think you ought to pick the later.

I made the mistake of not doing that. And if I can turn back time, I will club lessons 1 and 2 above. In fact I have started to believe that all that advice about travel and making merry and fun and all that in your 20s? Its crap! You ought to make money or gain monetizable skills. More on this in some more days.

C. Invest in relationships
Thing is, as am growing old, I realise that I dont have any meaningful relationships – the kinds that stay with me and help me when I need help. Lemme give an example. In the shoot today, the guy who was shooting needed a studio. He could curry a favour and get that studio for cheap. One of my friends, he can ask a million people to get him a discount on literally anything that he wants to buy. I on the other hand cant think of a single person who would want to help me. And there are people that I have literally begged. To give me work and what not. And yet they havent.

So, the lesson is, you MUST invest in relationships while you can. With time these relationships will become deeper and better and will give you infinite returns. Dont be me who thought that its ok to be eccentric and the talent would pay of at some point in time in future. It may. But future is not really the best play to live, if you ask me.

Of course, your life. You choose if these are applicable to you. I can only talk from experience and hindsight.

***

So thats it for the day. What are the few things that you learnt today? Please do share.

PS: Love this post! And I use way too many Ands. And I need to control it. And with that, its over and out.

What I want in life. Part 2.

Note: This is part 2 in a series. What I want in life, Part 1 is here.

After struggling for all these years, I think I now know what I want in life.

Before you get excited about my new found power of thought and clarity of mind and decide to hire me to help you, here is the spoiler. There was no divine intervention that made this discovery possible. And it did not come all of a sudden. Its been cooking in my head for some time and it was about time the cookery thing got over. And, as a result, I think I now know what I want. Here is it.

I want to write, travel and sleep.

And when I wake up, I want to go play Poker. Yes. Poker. That card game. I know, it sounds outrageous but I want it. And I want to do it for the rest of my life.

I no more want to rule kingdoms, buy fancy houses, drive around in cars. Really I dont. I am too old. I now merely want to write, travel and sleep when I am tired. And play a hand or two after I wake up. That’s it. Its that simple.

Write. Travel. Sleep. Poker. Sleep. Travel. Write. Poker. Write. Travel. Sleep. In any order. And repeat. Repeat. Repeat over and over again.

So now that I know what I want, I ideally ought to chuck everything else and just spend my time working towards these things. I know I would start at the bottom of these disciplines and age is definitely not on my side. I dont mind the age, I am a fast learner. I dont mind starting at the bottom, I already said that I am a fast learner. Everything looks ok. Except that small hitch. The Money one. Thing is, writing and travelling do not give you money. Not even the kinds to be able to pay your rent. And knowing my track record at poker and my ability to remember details, I know poker is not an option. And I dont have the talent or seed to bootstrap these things. Sigh.

So bottom line, I know what I want in life and its a tussle between head and heart. Pragmatism and dreaming. Left and the right. Old and the young. And, the sad bit, I know who is gonna win. Remember the split personality disorder that I spoke about the other day? I think I need to add more types in there.

So what do I do without the money?

What else? Chase it like a mad dog and get back in the rat race! Too many animals.

🙁

Now that the pragmatic head has won, I know that I cant chase these things. But I can at least talk about these things to make myself feel good about em? Right? Here.

A. Writing
I am not sure if I am a good writer. I know I love the feeling of fingers dancing on the keyboard and words forming by themselves. I love getting lost in my tiny laptop screen and the large world I weave in it. I love sitting at a local Starbucks and working over the din of people around. I love lying on my tummy and typing till odd hours in the night. I love it when people tell me that they loved what I’ve written. I am happy when something I write entertains people. I love creating stories. I love telling those stories. But then I dont know if I am good at it.

If the number of readers on this blog, number of comments, number of interactions, Klout score, any other metric is to be believed, I am not. I am like that irritating voice on the other end of the loud speaker that continues to blare incessantly, even when the voice knows that no one is interested in listening. And increasing the volume will not really help.

If the world at large starts liking what I write, I may be able to make money from it. But I dont think that unless you become a Chetan Bhagat or a Amish Tripathi, you could be a full time writer and make money. Of course there are journalists that just write and all that but then I am not talking about that kind of money. I am talking of the kind of money that people on this list make.

B. Travel
Travel is awesome. I can fill copious volume of texts talking about travel. But then, I shall try to be faster here.

So there are a lot of lucky people in the world who have been given an opportunity to travel for free and all that. There are ways to become that but I haven’t been blessed with any of those skills or attributes that are required to become a travel-for-free kinda guy.

So alas, I would have to pay for my travel. Unless I can become a good poker player. Which is kinda tough, if you ask me. Or unless I go back to working with an events company again. The kinds that does a lot of international events. Or become one of the umpteen porters for a celebrity.

C. Poker
I dont know how to play poker. As simple as that. I just know the rules of the game. But then if just the understanding of the rules made you good, everyone would be like Sachin. I dont understand odds and I hate probability as a concept. And I have a tough time concentrating.

And if I am so bad, why do I play? Because I love the “feel” of being on a poker table.

Being the fool I am, I want to play and because of everything that I’ve mentioned above, I end up losing a lot of money. Money that I dont really have. Money that I hope could’ve been put to better use.

I am losing so much money and time on the game that I have made up my mind to quit if I dont get better at it. And how would I know if I am getting any better? I would win more often than I would lose. Its a simple metric. Update. As of 20th Oct ’13 I quit playing poker. Not quit, but I am taking a break till the beginning of the next year.

The lucky ones who’ve made poker their profession, I am so jealous of them. So very jealous. They have money. They get to travel (for free). And they get to write about their game and all the places they travel to. If I could get lucky and make a career playing poker, it would be awesome. Because I would become that artist that I have always wanted to be (read this post). Funny how a lot of posts in the recent days have been around work and love and passion and dream.

D. Sleep
I will not talk about sleep. Just that over a last few weeks I have realized that sleep is an integral part of what I am. It makes me what I am and allows me to dream and think and stay creative. I want it. At least 7 hours in a day.

End Notes
Finally, the wishful thinking bit needs to end right now and I need to get slightly pragmatic. I know that I need to get back to zameen. So I know that I need to finish the Nidhi Kapoor Story by end of this year. And then either make one of my startup ideas to get working or find a real job. A job that may make me a corporate bitch but yet pays me money. And a lot of it. In 2014. Enough to buy comforts and not get bored. And not get bored means I would not have time to think about fuckeries in life. I sincerely believe in that “ignorant are the most blessed” adage.

How I wish I could live life in a dream where I am paid for being me. I am paid to merely exist and not move an inch. But then I am not Abhishek Bachchan or Ranbir Kapoor. I am not even a Bryan Adams. I would have to work hard. I will. Once I am over with Nidhi Kapoor Story.

But then, apart from a job that gives me a lot of money, or a startup where I make meaning, I really want to chase Kwan. The “Love, respect, community and money too” from a character in the movie Jerry McGuire. Whatever I do in 2014, I will ensure that Kwan happens. And while we are talking about Jerry, do read this post as well. It talks about what I really want to do in life. I am serious. Apart from writing, sleeping, traveling and poker that is.

And in the end, do pray for me.

P.S.: Written sometime in Sep 2013 and publishing in end of Oct 2013.

The Summer of 69

Started writing this a few days back. Finishing it today. Not changing the tenses.

I have spent the last hour listening to various covers and live performances of the Summer of 69. Some by Bryan Adams himself. And some by other bands who are covering Adams’ music. While I totally enjoyed all of those, something dawned on me. That I would never be an artist (or a performer) like that. I don’t even stand a chance. Not now, not tomorrow. Not in a thousand years. Even if stop doing everything and start learning guitar, I still wont have a chance.

Let me digress for a minute here. I define an artist as someone who creates original things – text, music, photographer etc and is not dependent on anyone else to create his output (unlike team sports and film). An artist works on his terms at his whims. And I define a performer as someone who has willfully taken up the task of entertaining an audience in exchange for a fee or a favour. Pretty technical huh? Coming back…

Its not about the guitar. Or about music. Or about the ability to sing. There is something else that these guys have, these artists I mean. These performers. They are not ordinary. Trust me they are not. Over the years, I have had the pleasure of seeing some of these performers up close and in person. As long as they are not on the stage, they are like you and me. They get hungry, they want Red Bull before they go up on stage, they seek attention, they want to sign autographs, they are greedy, they want to be paid by the minute etc. They are everything that you expect a successful human to be.

And then its time for them to go on the stage. The lights are dimmed. In the events parlance, we call it position. They take position. And then depending on the complexity of the setup and the show director, either a beam illuminates these guys or the entire stage comes alive with light. And then all of a sudden, like someone has flipped a switch, they transform from a regular human into a living thing larger than life. As large as God Himself if not more. And thing. Not being.

They know that every eye in the audience is upon them. Everyone is waiting for them to perform. Everyone has sky high expectations from them. Even if they are having an off day, they have to perform. And funny thing is, they do it. They deliver. Under all the pressure, they do it. They have this will to go out there and better themselves every time they are on the stage. And not just better themselves, they go beyond than that. They surprise people, make them happy, give them something to talk about when they go back.

Sigh! I can go on extolling their lives forever but then this post is not about them. Its about me. The sad old me. The sadder me after I saw all those videos of Bryan Adams’ bestest song ever IMHO.

The obvious question that is begging for an answer is, do I want to be like him? Like them? An artist? I don’t know the answer right now.

What I do know however, is that I
love the entire concept of performing like that and making people happy. May be that’s why I want to be in the show business. May be that why I loved my previous job. And may be, just may be, that’s why I hated my previous job. Let me elaborate on the love and hate bit.

The Love Part.
So till July this year, I was in the business of events management and I got to be a part of the entourage of multiple artists. And was in part responsible for assembling a show together. It was as close as I came to being a performer, except once upon a time when I was the MC for a game of housie. At work, even though I wasn’t probably the best of employees and I did cut corners, I loved being there. There were a lot of things about being this nameless individual in a large entourage. Travel for starters. In India. And abroad. Then everything I did had a tangible output. That I could see. Often, larger than life. Unlike advertising and other places where my output was merely an input for others to work on, here my work was the damn output. It was often as large as a 60′ wide stage. Once it was huge, about 44000 sq ft if I am not wrong. And it was awesome to see it come to life. And ofcourse the adrenaline rush that it gave me while the show was on. It was like putting a performance, except the artist catching all the eyeballs was someone else. I did not mind it really but I wish it happened with lot more frequency.

The Hate Part.
Coming to the hate part, since we were in the business of saving jobs (as a colleague once said) it meant that often, my life, my thoughts had no importance. There was no free will per se and it sucked. The entire point about being an artist is that you have an art that you know you are good at. And you know there are people who will happily pay money to see you perform. Patrons, if not random people. Thats what I am talking about. That is what was missing from work. Patrons.

The Sad Sad Part.
So here it the sad sad part. And the reason why I wrote this post.

I have these million lives that I want to live within this one life. And one of those lives is definitely a life of an artist. If not an artist, of a performer. And I know that however hard I may try, I will never be one. The closet I can be, is either be a nameless and faceless part of crowd that puts these shows together. Or haul their bags when they travel around the world. In either case, it would be a compromise.

Sigh! Lemme go kill myself about it.

In case you don’t see a post tomorrow on this blog, you know what did the papers did not publish. Because I was not an artist. And I was not a performer either.

Jerry, Micky and SG!

Note: This is part 1 of a series. What I want in life, Part 2 is here.

I now know what I want to do in life. And unlike all previous times, this time I am serious. So serious that I am going all-in this time.

So before I talk about it, have you guys seen Jerry McGuire? The guy who magically gets Rod Tidwell another contract, just when everyone else had dismissed him? And if you dont know Jerry, do you know Micky Goldmill? Rocky’s manager? In the Rocky series? The guy who gets Rocky to perform those magical things in the boxing ring? The power behind Rocky’s famously powerful punches?

No? Ok, so Jerry is a celebrity manager and is supposed to manage professional career of athletes. Micky is supposed to help Rocky with his fights.

Either man has no direct correlation to what their clients make their living from. And yet, by their mere presence around the character, they impacted the careers and lives of their clients. And what if they are fictional characters? The dreamer in me refuses to believe that these characters can’t be for real!

I did my research and my experience with Gravity came in handy. I realized that a very similar profession does exist in India as well. We call them artist managers. However unlike the western counterparts, we don’t really manage careers or impact lives. All we do is sell their time and carry their bags around when they are jet-setting the world.

And that, my friends, is what I want to do in life. ~~Manage a superstar and~~ carry his/her bags around the world as we s/he performs all over the world at exotic locations. And nothing else.

I in fact tweeted this a few minutes back.

I know what I want to do in life. Carry bags of a big film star on all her shows. The ideal place to work would be the likes of @CAA_KWAN
— Saurabh / SG (@saurabh) October 12, 2013

I thought after this tweet, I would be inundated with job offers from all parts of the country. I even wrote apology letters to the ones who don’t select me.

But alas, no one replied. May be today being the middle of the weekend, people did not see it. May be you, dear reader, could help.

So, if you are a superstar and you need a brilliant porter to carry your coffee, tea, bags, puppies, phones etc around, you know what to do. I can speak English and Hindi, I get visas easily and I hold a MBA degree. Oh, I have about 2000 twitter followers and once you hire me, I assure that the number would only swell up. This could come handy when we you are performing somewhere and want your fans to take a note. Do call me for an interview and I can show around my talent with bags and visas.

And, most importantly, here are my contact details.