life Goals – Page 2

I cried

Few facts first.

I am 34. Will be 35 this year. In other words, I will be past my prime in a few months.
My bank balance as we speak is 39000 and change. And no, I dont own a house. Or a car. I do own some stock.
I have no clue what I want to do in life. At different times in life I have wanted to make software, produce movies, become a travel writer, be an investor, teach, play poker professionally, play cricket, become a politician, make documentaries, be a twitter celebrity, ~~become a publisher author~~, an adrenaline junkie and I dont even recall half of the things! A bucket list is here.

Why am I talking about all this? Because I just a documentary on Warren E Buffett and at a point in the documentary, I cried. Will come back to it in a bit.

For the time being, if you are alive and you think you want to be a better person, you have to see it. Its on youtube here. Dont know how long its gonna stay there. Do see it while its around. Content like (expensive to produce, insightful etc) belongs in the public domain. Never know why museums are ticketed so high. In fact one of the things that I want to do in life is to create such things. That allow humans to learn more.

Am digressing.

Coming back to the documentary. I’ve known of WEB since 2004 (atleast) when Prof. Bakshi first talked about him at MDI. And since then I have consumed numerous pieces of text about him. I am, what they say, a fan. And I adulate him all the time.

So, when I heard about the documentary, I did not think much of it. After all whatever WEB says can be easily summarized in few lines. I was half-expecting it to be boring and yet another “fan” made documentary that will recycle facts and snippets from other previously published pieces of text.

But I couldn’t be more wrong.

The documentary had original footage and interviews with the most important people in his life – Charlie, Melinda & Bill, his children and couple of friends (including Carol Loomis). I got the rare look into his office. There were pics from his family album, footage from his personal archives and above all – interview with him, on things that are important to him. For the first time, I saw WEB as a human being. I saw his private life like I’ve never seen before.

It just made the demigod more human.

So, in the documentary he talks about things like Coke, Float, Bill Gates, Philanthropy, Moats, See’s Candies, his family, his team, various companies that he’s bought and most importantly, about himself.

While watching and I could be wrong here, I realised that the relationship with his wife probably was strained. After all he was busy reading all the time. And she admits that she and WEB differed on their respective approaches towards philanthropy. She believed that she had to give more money, sooner. He believed in the power of compounding and wanted to wait out as long as he could, before he gave it away. In the end, he got what he wanted, like he has always had.

And when the documentary talks about his decision to give his wealth away. And when they showed that press conference when he signs those letters to give away his wealth to his children and Bill Gates, I broke. I cried. With tears and flowing nose (despite my nasal polyps) and all that.

I dont know why I ended up in tears. Probably the gravity of the decision? The impact that his life would have on the world? Probably it was his greatest gift to his wife (that I think came too late and WEB would say, came just at the right time)? Probably because his life is in contrast to mine and Ive been thinking a lot about mine lately.

This is where I talk about me. Rant.

Compared to WEB who is super-focused at what he does, I am all over the place. And not that I havent tried to come back to one thing, its just that it feels stuffy when I do that. I am not myself. May be I am not supposed to be focused. And like Sheldon says, “we will never know.”

I dont know what I want to do. I am competitive but I am not like WEB. I want to make the money – to use it as a tool to work towards making the world a better place. And how do I make the world better? I dont know yet. Neither did WEB. But WEB had the tools – reading and focus – and the understanding of things like reputation, compounding and other things. And most importantly he was in the game to come out a winner. And he knew what game he wanted to play. So, he played the game. And everyday he trained himself along the way (and continues to do so, even at the age of 86). And eventually he reached a point where money became unimportant. And then he figured (thanks to his wife and other things in his environment) how he planned to make the world better. Wow! What a life! What a person!

For me, it I need to know the game I ought to be playing and then honing the skills till I have a superior, unfair disadvantage over others. So that I can make money.

Except that I am 35 and I have bills to pay.

The other thing. Do I even need to do this? Do I really want to do this? Why do I even want to make money? If my memory serves right, I have always wanted to be the richest man in the world. I wanted to be a dollar millionaire at 25 and a dollar billionaire by the time I am 35. I actually told this to a friend at MDI (Saumya J – hope she remembers). Another 5 odd months to go. I am worth about 15000 dollars. About a gazillion times less than what I had planned.

Compare me to 2 of the 5 people that I spend most of my time with. Last night I went on a drive with them. Both are pretty successful, on all counts. Happily married (to two wonderful women), each(family) has a kid. Both own cars, properties that run into crores (almost dollar millionaires), they have fulfilling careers, are reasonably fit and suffer from no large, life-threatening ailments to speak of. Days are full of mindless action that a high-performing naukri entails and weekends are spent with family and watching movies and running errands and there are holidays twice a year. And they both seemed pretty oblivious to fact that life could mean more (they are, as WEB says, “sleepwalking through life” – which is not wrong, but that is not for me). And I seemed lost for words to explain what that more could be.

I saw this glimpse into WEB’s life and I immediately knew what that more is. More is spending time doing things that you are uniquely positioned to do – outcome of Ovarian Lottery. In my case, more time I spend with life and things, more I realise that my purpose is teaching. Its mentoring. Its entertaining. Getting people to achieve their dreams. Ideally a combination of all four. I just need to find a way to reach a point where I could do it at a scale that impacts billions of people. Lately, I have started saying that by the time I die, my work has to impact a billion people. I dont know the shape of my work and I ~~hope I~~ will find it as I go along. Just that it sucks that I am 35 already and there is that looming threat of an unpredictable end. Often when you expect it the least.

Anyhow, a few other things that I am taking away from WEB and the documentary are:

Health. He gives an analogy that if you could get just one car for the rest of your life, how will you take care of it? Your body is that car. Will you not take care of it?
Focus. Though I am not sure I best exemplify this. So I am going to leave it at that.
Relationships. I need to have a Susie around. Though I am not sure about kids.
Compounding. If there is one thing that you could take away from his life, it would be compounding. Not just in terms of money but other things. You write everyday. You workout everyday. The key is everyday. Build on top of other work. I dont know if there is anything that I own that is compounding.
Reputation. Enough said.
Purpose. WEB made all the money in the world that he could. And then he gave it all away. Why was he doing it? What made him tick? I think the answer is that he was super competitive. More than anyone else. And he enjoyed it. And thats what made him do what he did. And when he gave it all away, he would have thought of no other, better way to use that money. The best part? Rather than he getting into things, he gave it to people he thought were best suited to use it! (circle of competence).
Death. Mortality is a very very real thing. And with each passing day, we are getting closer to it. And that means, each passing day, you have to try harder. And we ought to do things that make us happier, better and more fulfilled.

That’s it.

Do see the documentary. Its worth its weight in gold.

Work and all that

@JinxedSnowflake not happy but not sad either. no i did not. got here by LOT of luck, some hustle, some grind and LOT of help.

— SG (@saurabh) September 12, 2016

C asked, “Hi hoomans who are happy with their profession/career path, did you always know what you wanted to do? How did you get here?”

I responded, “not happy but not sad either. no i did not. got here by LOT of luck, some hustle, some grind and LOT of help.”

She asked me to elaborate. I thought 140 chars is too less. And thus, here is a longish explanation.

So, am I happy with my profession / career path?
Sort of. I am very happy at the place I am at. I run two small businesses. One I know will become big – I have someone partnering me on it and giving me direction. The other, I am not sure. There’s just me and a few friends that help as and when they get time. None of them is a well-oiled cash-churning machinery – I need to constantly work on them, think on them, invest time and resources and money and all that to be able to make ends meet. But then, I work for myself. And that makes me happy.

Can I make more money if I worked in a job? Of course.
Can I be happier? Of course.
Can I do better? Of course.
Could I’ve had a better career path? Of course.
Do I have regrets about what I do? No way!
Will I achieve my #lifeGoals? I believe I would. I am actually on my way!

Next, did I always know that I’d end up here? And how did I get here?
Let me club the two questions.

No I did not.

How requires the long answer. So, I did computer science before I did my MBA (from MDI, Gurgaon). And my first job post MBA was with GE Money where I was supposed to sell credit cards. I did it for three months (after a 11-month “training”) and I quit. In fact I knew in the first month itself that I had to quit. And I did. Back then, I was still fresh out of b-school and I still believed that I could change the world. I was still hopeful. I was dreamy. And I knew I loved advertisements. And thus I decided that I had to join an advertising agency. With no portfolio to speak of (I did not even know what a portfolio meant), I approached a recruiter and asked her to find me openings. [grind]. She told me that I could be a brand planner at best and none of the bigger agencies would hire me and I would have to take a pay cut. So I interviewed with two “startups”, both accepted me and the person who offered me more money, I joined him. And it was the best damn move of my life. [luck].

For the next two years I worked with Raj at CLA. I saw Vikram and Raj build up a team and a body of work that was / is enviable. I learnt the business, met some amazing folks (some are friends till date) and most importantly, realised that I wasn’t good enough. So, a time came when I had to move on. Plus Raj had shown me that my world is not limited to my batchmates and peers and all that.

Quit CLA to start something with a friend. I did not work out. Joined an events agency (not that I knew what events management was – I trusted the guy (Suvi at Gravity) and took a leap of faith. [luck]. It was the second best move ever. Next three years I worked really hard [grind], travelled the world, learnt how “real” businesses are managed and grew a lot as a person. I also realised that I am an adrenaline junkie. Well, not a junkie per se but I love on-the-spur decision. I love live entertainment. I love action. I love travel. I love to make people happy. And most importantly, I learnt that I am cut out for the business of events.

Quit Gravity to startup yet again. This time with another set of friends. Each day at 5times5 was a battle. We tried a lot of things, most failed and yet we kept at it. [grind] It was the toughest thing that I’ve ever done in my life. Could’ve done more. Could’ve hustled more. But I could not. I still believe I could’ve done it better. Anyhow, while we sustained business for almost 18 months (purely because of the hardwork that my partners put in, we never broke even, leave alone getting profitable), it got reaffirmed in my head that I need freedom and independence in how I work. We eventually shut the business, moved on and I was lucky to find a job fairly fast. With a social media agency. [luck]. This time, the guys who hired me took a leap of faith, by hiring someone like me who was new to this whole social media thing. But I think I did ok. But it got stifling pretty fast and I wasnt good enough for them to bend the rules for me. And I had learnt the importance of time by then. So, quit them in about 6 months.

Started freelancing – thanks to (Sanjay at SWL), they offered me the first gig. And from there on, I hustled really hard. I told everyone I knew that I am in the market and I can work on brand planning, social media and / or events. People couldn’t fathom how could one guy do all three (and they still dont get it). I was ridiculed (I still get ridiculed). I kept at it. [hustle]. I got a few projects that helped me pay my bills and survive in Mumbai. Oh, I was lucky that I did not have to send money back home. [luck].

And then, one fine day, I struck gold. A guy I worked for knew a guy who knew another guy who was looking for a brand planner for a project in Nigeria. [luck]. I knew nothing about Nigeria and the guy who was hiring me knew nothing about me. He offered for some reason and I needed the money, so I took the gig. Did pretty well with that project (I think) and starting getting more work from the guy. With each piece of work, we got comfortable with each other and started working on more things. Think of a positive feedback loop. So much so that today Rajesh (at Viscomm) and I have partnered to setup an events management business, C4E. And I spend bulk of my time working with him at Viscomm and C4E. And this is where I am.

And now that I am at it, lemme answer a few more questions that C did not ask.

Will I do this for rest of my life?
I dont know. I have never planned my life and I dont think I can plan. I take things as they come and then react. All I know is that each year, I need to build on what I did in the year before.

What is next?
Again, I dont know. One things for sure. For the next few years, I am going to build C4E and grow AWSL. I have a clear idea about how I want C4E to evolve (an entertainment conglomerate). And a vague idea about what I want AWSL to be (enabler for other businesses). Will explain what I mean by this and intend these to be, in subsequent posts. For the time being, I think I am enjoying where I am. Wish me luck!

Oh, one more thing. Apart from “work”, there are a few things that excite me and I want to explore further. I dont know how and when and where and why etc. but I will. These are:

Writing. I did write a book in 2014. And I am working (albeit very slowly) on the next. And I will probably write a few more before I die. So, writing is on the cards.
Music. I want to play guitar. And I will learn it someday.
Fitness. I really want to get fit. So I will probably spend a lot of time in the coming years on my fitness. I have made a promise to myself that I will scale Mt. Everest before 2025. So that.
Compete. I want to compete in some sport at the international level. At 34, I am too old to be an athlete. So, I will probably pick up a sport like Pool, Snooker or Poker. So may be that.
Teach. I dont know if I am wise enough to teach. But I have been in front of students and I love the feeling. I love being the enabler and I want to give teaching a sincere shot.

That’s it I guess. Thank you C for helping me think on this. While I was writing this, I realised that I’ve been extremely lucky in life. I may not have a house and I may not earn as much as my peers do, but I have a lot to be thankful for. I just hope things work out and I do make the ding. And I do become the richest man in the world! After all somethings never change – even if its been 10 years since you passed out of MDI. You are a change master and you can and you will change the world! No?

P.S.: And, if you have time, you must read the story of Prof. Bakshi.

P.P.S.: Another epiphany. All these people that I have met, all the things that I have done, is because I went out and made tons of loose connections. Last few months I have stopped doing that. I need to re-start.

By 2025

I just made a promise to myself. That by 2025, I would have climbed to the top of the Everest. Tall claim. But I will.

Everest!

Why a date in the first place?
Vivek tells me that goals without dates are meaningless. And this cartoon by ZenPencils opened up my eyes. I had to put a date. And I couldn’t think of anything else but a 10-year time frame to attempt it.

Why ten years?
People tell me that it takes 18 months of preparation and 60 lakhs INR to give Everest a serious shot. 18 months to acclimatize the body and get to the required fitness level. 60 lakhs to pay the Sherpas and others (its an established business where you pay companies a certain sum and they ensure that you reach the summit).

So I need time to be able to earn that kind of money. And I need to provide for my family. And I need to fulfill my “reason” – the reason I was put here for. I refuse to believe that all this is just a big coincidence. May be it is – after all, everything will be dead in the long run, including Mother Earth. But I refuse to believe that. There has to be an explanation. Not too evolved spiritually but whatever little I know of, I have a reason and I need to find it in 10 years.

And yes, there is a big big chance that I may not come back. And hence the ten years. To live this life.

Why Everest?
Because it is probably the toughest thing to do, in terms of human endurance? Even if it is not the toughest, it is definitely the highest. And it may be commercialized and easy if you have the money and all that, it remains the highest point on Mother Earth. And I will go up there. By 2025.

Serious!

The Balloon Guy

Today, about an hour back (about 10:30), I was walking around Bandra with a friend. We passed a dark alley and in the corner, behind the shadows was lurking a guy who was apparently selling Balloons. He was on a bicycle and there were some balloons hanging from the front of his bike. We looked at him and like every grown up who ignores things as playful and amateur as balloons, we moved on.

However, the man starting pleading to us, in low tones. He said something to the effect that he hadnt sold a single balloon in the day and he wont be able to buy himself dinner. Being a dilliwallah, I ignored his plea and was concerned for my friends’ safety. I herded her away from that dark alley, into the bright light cast by the huge Starbucks signboard up ahead.

We found a rick for her and once I put her in a rick and was walking back, it struck me that the balloon guy must be working real hard to earn his living and it must have taken a lot of balls to be able to ask for alms. And he’s probably worked hard all his life (selling balloons cant be easy), it must be even more tough for him to beg.

Left me wondering that we crave for things like houses and cars and we fight for things like God and idols of stone but we cant find a way to help people like that balloon wala make enough to feed his family. What’s the point of it?

Of course I wont have answers to these issues that perplex the intelligentsia. But I know for sure that that it could be a great purpose in life. To be able to help others upgrade the lives they lead. And how would I do that? I dont know. But I shall find out. I have at least 33 more years to go. And I will work on increasing that as we go along.

Help me on it? Please?

#lifeGoals

So this is a long list of things that I hope I can achieve in life. I may or may not have the talent, skill, determination, energy, time et al for these but I would love to do these. And no, not to be confused with the bucket list.

Write something as amazing as Hoshwalon Ko Khabar Kya. Here is a sample. And Write something as cool as Lag Ja Gale. Here. Basically write well. So well that junta wants to sing em. So well that it moves people.
Get 10K followers on twitter. As of today, I have 2400 odd followers.
Travel only business class.
May be climb the Everest! (update: I aim to do this by 2025).
Spot a page 3 celeb reading one of my books.
Date a supermodel.
Make a Fucket List. And do things on it. Yes, with an F.

More as I go along.

P.S.: For the uninitiated, bucket list is where I get serious about things. #lifeGoals is more about vanity.

Wishlist / Bucket List

I was talking to a friend and I realized that I dont have one single wishlist. I have blogged about my todo’s in past (here, here, here)

Here is my wishlist (aka the bucket list)

~~Get a Royal Enfield Bullet Electra.~~ (Got in Apr 2009)
~~Get a Sony PSP~~. (Got it in Mar 2008)
~~Buy an iPod.~~ (Got it in Aug 2006 and donated it to my sis in Dec 2008)
~~Publish at least one book.~~ (Done. The Nidhi Kapoor Story in Oct / Nov 2014)
Preferably a travel book.
~~Teach.~~ (Done. At EMDI. Two courses. On marketing and planning. Aug / Sep 2014)
~~Bunjee Jump.~~ (Jumped off Macau Tower in May 2010)
Bike from Kanyakumari to Leh.
And from Rann of Kutch to Arunachal Pradesh.
~~Visit places in my Travel WishList.~~ Visit 1000 cities across the world.
Win a WSOP bracelet.
Run a Marathon in less than 4 hours.

Funny how I have want so many materialistic things in life!

Update. The initial list had 10 items. The first ten. Added more as I went along.

Last updated on 16 Sep 2016