War, starring Hrithik Roshan and Tiger Shroff (more on Wikipedia)
A couple of days ago, I did something that is very unlike me – went and saw a first-day first-show of a Bollywood Movie!
When I was told it is an action film and is a story of a spy, I had my doubts – I mean look at Bard of Blood and Family Man. But sometimes you have to do things that you may not want to. And to be honest, while I went for it very reluctantly (an understatement) but I must admit that I enjoyed watching it. I think War probably marks the coming of age for Bollywood action flicks.
Having said that, as a writer, there are a few things that I need to talk about that I could not digest. Please note that there are spoilers ahead. Please read ahead only if you have seen the movie. And if you plan to, please do not read from here on.
A.
So, in the movie, you learn that the person betraying the country is someone from the team itself (as always is). But the traitor has been able to avoid detection because he has taken the face (plastic surgery) and tone (vocal cord modulation) and mannerisms (I don’t know how) of another soldier that has died previously.
Now, the thing is, the tool of plastic surgery and vocal cords modulation is one of the laziest things you can ever use to spring surprises and suspense.
If you are a detective, you BETTER work hard to solve the case. You are a superhero, goddamit! Agreed that in the film the lead spy was flummoxed by this plastic surgery and all that. But what did I do to deserve earn answers?
And more importantly, the audience needs to work hard alongside the detective. It is as important for the audience to solve the case alongside, as it is for the spy. People watch movies (or read books) because when they watch or read, in their heads they are living extraordinary lives (of the spy) that they can never live otherwise.
And finally, as the creator of the story, you better work HARDER to create a mystery that your readers / viewers can solve alongside. It is what gives them release. It is what will make them go wow. This release that the audience gets made Sherlock great. And Poirot. And Reacher. And almost all the detectives / sleuths / spies that we have come to love over the years.
Of course, they go wow when they see all those thousands of abs scattered around. But you are not making an eye-candy flick. It’s a spy film!
B.
The other issue I have with the story is that the character of Tiger Shroff did not get his due.
In the entire first half of the film, he is shown as a person that is struggling, literally dying, to prove that he is a true patriot. And he wants to redeem himself and his mother for the things that his father did.
And the let down is that he is killed without him even getting a chance to get what he seeks! I mean, how DARE you kill a character like that like that?
Like that one – you did so much hard work to build a character and tell us about his wants and likes and all that. I want to fall in love with the character. I want to cry when he dies. In my case, I was laughing because of the frivolity of the plot.
Like that two – you invested so much time in building it and so much effort in creating his story and all that. And then you just killed him, just like that. And you gave him almost zero shot at redemption! Why would you do that?
In a story, you do NOT create a character and tell me what he wants and then do NOT take that character to a place where he gets what he’s wanted all along. Of course in the pursuit of his “want”, the character may fail (Joker failed to get what he wanted) but he has to die fighting and as the audience, I need to be a part of his struggle. I need to feel for him. Feel happy that he did or did not reach there. Feel sad that he could not reach there.
In #war, he just died. Like died without even putting up a fight. And the worst part? His last act before he died was insubordination. I mean is that great last memory of the second most important character in the story?
Can’t digest.
So yeah. That’s it.
Phew. I feel lighter now that I have written this.
Of course, I am absolutely ok with creating eye-candy and with leaving logic behind. No doubt that the film is an absolute treat to watch. It has everything that a Bollywood fan may want. In fact, I would love to make films like that. But then this is very close to the kind of stories I write. And thus I had to speak my mind.
And in the end, I must mention that each piece I write where I critique the work of others must be read alongside this disclaimer by Anton Ego. Read is here.
PS: Even though I am one-half of the TheRedSparrow, this post has been written in my personal capacity.
I did it.
The unthinkable.
The worst thing that I could ever do as a moviegoer.
I saw Veere Di Wedding (IMDB)!
Yeah, the same movie that has driven a wedge between the otherwise stable relationships of all the men and women that were living in peace and harmony. There are men dismissing the movie as a chick-flick. There are women defending the content. Then there are men siding with the film and there are women who are saying that modern girls around their 30s are not like how they’ve been portrayed.
Its a fascinating battle brewing and I would love to take a side but then I am not as educated or informed as the twitterati. Oh, my universe is limited to twitter only.
Why would I commit an atrocity of this magnitude on myself?
Well. Lesser said about it, the better. Now that its been done, it’s time to write a review. After I got some 300 odd hits on my review for Bhavesh Joshi, I have this career as a film-reviewer and I ought to stay with it.
So, the logline is, a group of four girl friends, each with a dysfunctional family, tries to come to terms with their respective issues as they come together for the wedding of one of the girls from the group. Neat. Sounds like fun. Similar to Dil Chahata Hai – a story of three friends trying to grow up as they make a trip to Goa.
Still from Veere Di Wedding
Like in DCH, there are these friends, there is banter and leg pulling and pranks. There is travel, there is music, there is emotions and there is a lot more jazz. No, not music but things that make movies, movies. But you know, this is where similarities end!
I’ll come back to it.
PS: If Farhan Sir is reading this, please excuse me. For I have sinned by comparing your masterpiece with this!
So, the friend I saw the film with, she said the film is inspired by the famous sitcom, Sex And The City. No, I haven’t seen the sitcom. But I am told that the even though it has a million episodes or something, sitcom stays true to the theme (of 4 middle-aged women trying to cope with relationships in a big, fast-paced city). Each has a set of relationship issues that needs sorting and the friends are the support system, the coping mechanism, the bouncing board and all that.
In VDW, while the inspiration is striking, the “episode” is just about 2 hours long, it veers all over the place. The characters are flat, the friendship bland and there is no support or coping or bouncing happening. Flat as in wine that’s been left in the open for too long. Bland as in cheese that’s been given too much air.
Coming back to DCH, the relationships (both between the set of friends and with others) were really deep. You could experience their elation, anguish, anger, happiness and all those things. In each scene. In each dialogue. In VDW, you cant remember if they were laughing in the previous scene or if they were crying. May be a gang of girls is like that? On a perpetual rollercoaster ride. I am not sure. At least the ones I hung out with were, are not like that.
In DCH, when the guys argue and fight and all that, you feel their anger and the pain. You can understand their actions. You know the dude has fucked up and you take sides. In VDW, the conflict, whatever little of it has been portrayed, is so weak that you don’t realize that it was the peak and the characters need to resolve it to take the story to the ending! Mr. Campbell must’ve turned in his grave. Of course not every story has to conform to his monomyth structure.
You know of those movies? Coming of age? Bildungsroman? May be VDW is an attempt in that direction? If it is, they ought to have spoken to Abhishek Kapoor. The guy, I think, has got coming of age right in India. You know of his repertoire?
Anyhow. The movie, ladies and gentleman is so ordinary that you can easily skip it!
If I were working on the project, what would I improve?
A lot!
A. The story to start with. Actually come to think of it, the story was ok, you could tweak it a bit. But screenplay needed a lot of work. It just couldn’t keep me interested. Despite all the gorgeous places that films has been shot at, all the color that is splashed around by the sets, all the banter between friends, all the mockery that they’ve made of the loud South Delhi culture, the film couldn’t keep my interest.
B. I’d definitely improve the on-screen camaraderie between these friends. I mean I’ve never been part of these pajama parties, as they call em, but I am sure they are lot more fun. The banter is forced. The dialogues are predictable. The lines are cliched. Apart from a bracelet with their initials and a painting by mothers of one of the friends, they don’t seem to have anything that identifies them as part of a clique. The screenplay should’ve established their friendship better and stronger.
C. The conflict, when it all was supposed to fall apart, when the friends fight, when they call names and all that, is so weak and so short-lived that you don’t even realize that it had happened. Compare it with DCH. There is a big-ass argument and a fight and it takes Herculean effort to fix! Here, in VDW, all it took was a holiday? A phone call? Come on!
D. There are some really bad product placements. When If you see the film, you will notice that there are scenes that have blatant and liberal placement for brands like Uber, Bikaji, Air India and others. And these are done so bad that you think you are in a 2-hour long advertisement. Someone needs to bring back the love and passion in the business of making films.
Lemme talk of each of the Veeres, as they call themselves.
The one with the cigarette.
I don’t know why one of the characters always had a cigarette around. In the loo, in the car, on the beach, on the bed, in the wedding. Ok, I know you want to establish her as a free-spirited woman (did you?), could you not find a better instrument than a cigarette? Or those Calvin Klein sports bras?
The bride.
Ok, you are scared of this whole thing called marriage. I understand. I actually think that her character was written well! I don’t have any complaints. But then, I also don’t really have any vivid memories of her after I’ve seen the movie. She is ordinary. You know how you have this salt-shaker on the dining table that no-one notices unless they need em? That!
The lawyer.
Sigh. Lesser said the better.
If you can’t seem to endure this blogpost, please skip to the bottom and do read the open letter that I’ve written to her.
The married one.
She is actually the best of the lot. Played her part well. Had better one-liners to deliver compared to others. I wish she had a meatier role. She could’ve held the story together. But then shes not a Kapoor you know. Or may be I am wrong. The point however remains that her character had hope and they fucked it up.
The good parts?
There are a few two. No, seriously. There are. Here’ a list.
A. There is this character called Bhandari.
He comes in rather late but when he does, he is probably what makes the film tolerable. He may sound crass, down-market, a letch or whatever but he is what he is. He’s done a great job – the kinds that would’ve taken a lot of effort to pull off. I want to see more of him. I actually miss him. He doesn’t have a lot of dialogues or scenes but every-time he comes up, you do take notice. He’s like that subtle flavour, seasoning in a complex dish that you cant put your finger on. But you know that the dish has the distinctive taste because of that one flavour. You know? The magic sauce? That!
B. I loved the cinematography!
The locations are breathtaking. The movie looks gorgeous. Of course the 4 ladies are pretty and all that but even if I removed them from the shots, the empty frames would look great! Its, as more established critics will say, is
So, the verdict?
Don’t go to a movie hall to see it.
Once its on Netflix, you may want to spend an evening fast-forwarding your way through it.
I’d give Veere Di Wedding a 1 star.
Also, I must say that I saw the film on a Tuesday night and the hall was almost half-full. Which is a lot considering its been a few days since the film came out. So maybe, there’s something there.
And while you are at it, you may want to see this review by this lady.
Oh, if despite the warning, you do decide to watch this, all the best!
Do let me know what you think.
I am @saurabh on twitter.
Thanks for reading!
SG
PS.: As I end this, there are two things that I want to talk about.
A, Please know that as a critic and a reviewer, I do not want to merely diss the creators. My intent of being a critic is not to discourage the ones that do the new. But to learn from them. And when its my turn to create, not repeat the mistakes. I subscribe to Anton Ego says about critics.
And B. As someone who’s had a crush on Sonam Kapoor K Ahuja since I was a child (when I first saw her in Pyar Ki Ganga Bahe), may I please write an open letter to her? Here goes…
Dear Sonam,
I really really love your sense of style. Plus I am a big fan of your smile. It is second only to Julia Roberts’ . The way you carry and conduct yourself? It is so unique that you’re one of your kind. Anyone would want to give their arm and leg to see you smile. I will.
But…
But could you PLEASE stop acting?
I mean take inspiration from your sister – Rhea. She is a producer. And she has chosen to remain that. What if you remain a mere socialite? and actually up the ante at those parties and charities and fashion events? Really! As a marketer, I really think that’s a greater opportunity for you. For every crappy film that you do, you reduce the brand value and you takeaway reasons from brands like Loreal et al to pull the plug. There is a limit to which that these brands can support you. No?
Oh, btw, even if you decide to continue working in films as an actor, of course as someone who loves you, I will continue to support you. All the best!
So yesterday, I saw Bhavesh Joshi. And this is the review.
I first heard about the movie was when I saw the trailer at one of the other movies that I saw a few weeks ago. Yeah, am watching a lot more movies.
Anyhow. So I saw the trailer and I knew I had to go see Bhavesh. And then I forgot about it. Till I met a friend who writes films (one feature under his belt, second underway) and he told me how Phantom is struggling with Bhavesh Joshi and its been stuck for 4 years and so on and so forth. No, I don’t know any more gossip and all that but they were struggling for sure.
So when yesterday a friend and I were deciding to go see VDW, somehow we realized that Bhavesh is also releasing the same day. And I tricked her into booking Bhavesh. Yay!
Yay for having avoided VSW VDW (the movie is apparently so bad that I even got the name wrong) which going by this review is a super decision (the review has since been deleted – I suspect the SM team from the VDW reached out to the lady ;P). But a big yay and a #selfPatOnBack.
But then, the yay was short-lived.
It lasted till the interval during Bhavesh – that’s when the movie starts going downhill. Like Jokersays, everyone is on the edge and all they need is a push. Bhavesh was teetering on the edge and dint even need the push. It just needed a whiff of air. And there was a fucking hailstorm blowing in Bhavesh’s face. A hailstorm made of poor story, lacklustre plot, ordinary acting and other pieces of mediocrity that you don’t typically expect from Phantom. I guess everyone has their ups and downs!
What the F! Its an Anurag Kashyap Vikramaditya Motwane film for fuck sake!
Wait. Stay with me. I’ll come back to it.
For the time being, here’s a one-line summary of the film, or the logline, as they call it in the industry. Bhavesh Joshi is a common-man turned vigilante that takes on the might of the politician-businessmen nexus hellbent on fucking with the city to make money.
I were a film producer and this logline was narrated to me, the first reaction would have been, “what a awe-fuckin-some idea!“. And then I would be shrouded in a heady mix of fear, awe and excitement.
Fear – has something like this ever been attempted in India?
No, not Krissh. It’s lame at another level that doesn’t even merit another word on this blog. Or on the whole of Internet. Not even in the history books that are often written at the behest of celebrities. Wait Mr. Garg. This is not about Krissh.
Can I make a film that is so simple and yet so complex? Am I evolved enough to handle? I would be afraid. Really.
Awe – what all can I do with it?
To the film maker in me, the logline makes me gasp at the tremendous opportunities that I can explore with the plot. I’d be awed by the shades of characters that I can create. It inspires awe by allowing me to explore dark themes that most other movies don’t allow me to.
Excitement – can I bring it alive?
Fear and bravado often gives way to daring. And that is where excitement is. Remember that excitement that Red talks about? In case you’ve lived under a rock, he says, “I find I’m so excited, I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head. I think it the excitement only a free man can feel, a free man at the start of a long journey whose conclusion is uncertain.”
I feel a similar excitement when I think about this logline, this plot! Can’t you feel it? The fear, the awe, the excitement?
Oh, and once these emotions have gone past me, I would let go of the opportunity to make this film. Really. Why? Because I wont have the balls to produce it!
No really. I wont. Its a very risky idea. Unless I have a lot of money that I can throw around, lose and not lose my sleep over it. Its not even a venture where I see a potential of a 10x return!
But if all producers were like me, no ambitious projects will ever get made! I love people like Phantom for exactly the same reason. Truth be told, the only reason I saw this was because only a Phantom could’ve dared to make a movie like this. Or may be Drishyam. These are the only two sets of people that try new things. Or like Apple said in one of their ads, “push the human race forward!”
Where I said no, they decided to back this up. They found the money. And the balls. And they jumped in.
And I thank them for that. For unless I had seen what Bhavesh is, I wouldn’t know what Bhavesh could be. As a writer, there are a million lessons in what not to do while working on a film (more on this later).
So, after all that ado for nothing, the movie, in one word is disappointing!
There is so so so (repetition on purpose) much potential in the movie that it could’ve been a legit competition to the likes of Batman. Just that it fails to go anywhere. Lemme make a list.
A. For starters, the movies lacks a credible and powerful villain.
Thing with Superheroes is that while they are awesome and do great things and all that, they need a villain (or an anti-hero) to be able to showcase their might, their strength and even their vulnerability.
I mean can you imagine a Batman without a Joker? Or a Sherlock for that matter without a Moriarty? There is no one that makes Bhavesh Joshi what he eventually becomes. Agree that he fights against a system, a set of people and all that. But is he up against a league A villain? No!
There is no challenge. There is just systematic pressure. There is no personality, no individual, no anti-hero that makes Bhavesh get out from the bed. I mean why does Bhavesh exist? He wants to do good. Ok. Who doesn’t? Ramu Kaka, the security guard from my building wants to do good and is willing to risk whatever when he feels that he’s been wronged!
B.Characters are not memorable.
There are times that you feel for the characters and their respective losses but the characters are not memorable at all. I saw the movie last night and even though its not been 24 hours since, I cant seem to remember one great thing that any of the characters said. Or did. Or stood for.
Ok I agree that Bhavesh stood for something but then is that what I want to take away from a Superhero movie? No way man! Remember my Ramu Kaka? Bhavesh. That!
C. Too long.
The movie has at least 3 long scenes that do not add one bit to the story. I mean they were shot in typical Tarantino-meets-Slumdog cinematic style and had one or two fine moments. But…
But did they add to the story? No.
But did they establish Bhavesh? No.
But did they help make the villain more villainous? No.
No.
No and no.
And more no.
Why did they put those shots? To make it dark? To give me that adrenaline rush? To ensure that the movie is 2 and half hours long? Come on!
D. The post-interval snafu.
The movie was a great watch till the time interval happened.
From the very beginning, the story progresses at a snail’s pace but since they were still building the narrative, it was ok. I could understand. But once the conflict had reached the high point and I was hoping for a masterful resolution, the nudge from that edge, those winds start blowing. The movie, like I said already, goes downhill. So downhill that I am beginning to question the genius of Anurag Kashyap Motwane.
That’s about it from me.
Oh, the music by Amit Trivedi – Amitabh Bhattacharya duo is great as always. The background score could’ve been far better. The acting is ok – like I said, no character stands out. There aren’t any moments that you retain after you’ve watched the movie. You don’t even feel sorry for their loss. And neither do you feel any elation for their victory.
Bhavesh Joshi may be a Superhero that we need (in the Indian cinema) but we definitely deserve someone better than Bhavesh. Oh, I’d like to create one. Anyone wants to collaborate? I am @saurabh on twitter.
To end this longish review, I’d give Bhavesh Joshi 2 stars out of 5.
But please do see the film. Its brave. Its an interesting story that you often don’t get to see coming out of India. And the movie makes me hopeful that cinema in India will continue to do well. Oh, and Thank You Anurag, Vikramaditya and others for Bhavesh Joshi. I will want to see more from you. And hopefully, soon.
On more thing. Of course I remain a mere critic and like I do in most reviews that I do, lemme quote Anton here. He says, “In many ways, the work of a critic is easy. We risk very little, yet enjoy a position over those who offer up their work and their selves to our judgment. We thrive on negative criticism, which is fun to write and to read. But the bitter truth we critics must face is that, in the grand scheme of things, the average piece of junk is probably more meaningful than our criticism designating it so. But there are times when a critic truly risks something, and that is in the discovery and defense of the new. The world is often unkind to new talent, new creations. The new needs friends…”
Over and out.
Saurabh Garg
2 Jun 2018
PS: If I were to work on the plot, I would make following changes to the script.
1. Add more shades of dark to the villains. I’d actually create an anti-hero that the audience roots for. Something that divides the audience on their opinion. You know Joker? Whatever he says, speaks or does is rational and logical. Remember Thanos from the recent Avengers? You actually want the villain to win. You fight with your friends and you are not sure what is good and what is bad. You want to get aligned to their “cause.” Bhavesh needs a cause. A thing that an aam-aadmi wants to get attached to.
2. I wont Indianise the script or the plot. I will not put a love angle when its not required. There is that mandatory girlfriend. Why? Why do we need her? Why does Bhavesh need her?
3. I will make the script credible. You are telling me that the person could sit in the airport and hack the immigration system? You tell me that you could be on a run for a few weeks and you could still eat a vada-pao without looking over your shoulders? You don’t leave fingerprints all over the world and while the the cop knows when to call the immigration system, he doesn’t know when to summon the forensics experts?
Oh and the alternate ending? I have it written. Just that I don’t want to publish is here and spoil the film. Write to me (@saurabh on twitter) and I will mail you back.
P.P.S.: I made this mindmap while I was writing the review. In case you want to see, its available for free for you to download. You’d need www.xmind.net (free) to see / edit it. Do tell me if you find this useful.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls and children of all ages, here is a grand announcement.
I am in love! I. AM. IN. LOVE!
With Frances. Of the Frances Ha fame. I will get to her in a minute. In the meanwhile, let me get a couple of disclosures out of the way.
a. I am FINALLY over sgMS. Long story. For a different day. But, I am back to being on the lookout for that perfect love. If there is something like that. The romantic is me (who has this never-ending zest for life) would want to believe that there is. The pragmatic in me (who stares at a balding old man in the mirror, growing older by the day, every morning while cleaning my teeth) says it’s a myth. I’d let time decide.
b. I don’t watch movies unless something is really really recommended or I get amazing company. So when Prateek recommended Frances Ha, I was slightly skeptic. But Prateek is a master at people watching and he knows how to read people bette than anyone else I know. If he recommends something, I take it very seriously. So I had to watch it.
Coming back to Frances.
I am in love! I am saying this for I don’t know, a hundredth time. And I can say it a 100 more times if I have to. Because I am. I could not imagine that someone like Frances could actually exist. Even if she is a figment of imagination of a film maker.
She is everything that I ever want to be. She is a little mad, a little quirky, a little creative, a little jealous of her best friend, a little lost, a little human, a little cool, a little interesting, a little mysterious, a little impulsive, a little wanderlust, a little this and a little that. But, but, she is super super adorable. The kind I could live my life with. The kind that would make life worth living. The kind that would make me want to plan for elaborate surprises.
To be honest, to stumble on someone as great is no mean feat. Especially when it’s coming on the back of an on-off relationship with probably the best thing (apologies to the feminists for objectifying her) God ever made, #sgMS.
So in the movie, Frances is this not so young woman who is on a perpetual look out for the love of her life, little sunshine, some money to be able to have a place of her own and her identity. The hunt takes her to interesting places, throws her in interesting parties, makes her bump into interesting people and takes her to oddball jobs. The movie follows her adventure as she finds her way through life. Through tribulations, sorrows, drunken night outs and awkward dates.
She says, “I like things that look like mistakes.” And a man around her says that she’s “undatable.” Would you not fall for a woman like that? You know that feeling? When you meet someone and you know that she is PERFECT for you!
Let me change tracks and talk about myself here for a second now. I have no shame or guilt in admitting that I am undatable as well. And I am lost. And I want a place of my own and I want my own identity. And I want money. Lots of it. Having made a list of all these things I want, I still don’t know what I really want. I refuse to stick to one job yet I believe that I am great at whatever task I take up.
Do you see where I am going with this? Don’t you think I ought to get a Frances in my life to share my highs and lows with? So, here is the million dollar question. Would you want to be my Frances? You want to make a mistake? And do you like things that look like mistakes? I promise I would stick around. I tend to. Find me on FB, Twitter and other places. Give me a sign. If there’s one thing I have done right, it is that I have made myself very easy to find – on the web. The code word when you do it is, like Frances would mockingly say, “Ahoy Sexy!”
P.S.: Thanks Prateek for recommending the movie. You very well knew that I don’t watch movies but I did see this one and did I love it? Hell yeah!
P.P.S.: The love thing with Frances? It was not that love-in-first-sight kind of love. I am too old for that. She grew on me. I was confused in the beginning about my feelings for her but when she finally reached Paris in the movie and had that conversation with her friend, I had my aha moment. You have to watch the movie.
For a 30+ year old man, I realized that I am very very melodramatic. And I am the king of mush, if I may. I mean I have always known that I like romantic comedies (Notting Hill, Maine Pyar Kiya, Serendipity, DDLJ and others) but I did not know that I would be such a sucker for well told romantic stories. Before I go ahead with writing a review / post, a note to self: must try and write a romantic story.
So I was on this long flight over the Atlantic and I had nothing to do. I was forced to turn on the 6″ or so wide screen and this film, Love Actually, caught my fancy. My film policy is that I want to watch the first ten minutes of a movie and then see if I want to see the entire thing.
Love Actually is like an anthology of love stories of a few different couples characters that are loosely related to each other. Remember NY, I Love You? Life in a Metro? Its like multiple stories in one story. I am very very sure that I want to write one of these cities of love things. May be Delhi, may be Mumbai. In 2014, I promise I would write.
Anyway, coming back to the movie, the ten minute test that I have for films, Love Actually passed it with flying colours. In fact the first few minutes-when the aging rockstar sings the modified version of an old British classic, Love Is All Around-set the tone of the movie for me. The way that actor goes about performing for that song on screen, I could give an arm and a leg to see him doing that for real. He’s singing it with so much passion, so much energy, a child-like enthusiasm and that thing, that in Delhi we call, feel. Its contagious. Its addictive. Its viral. I want to see it over and over again and keep watching it on loop. Its done so so well. Watch it here.
And after that sequence, the movie gets into other various characters and their stories. And despite numerous characters and their complex professions and obsessions, I was hooked. So hooked that a part of me did not want the stories to end. And a part of me wanted the characters to find their true love and see them living happily ever after. Any story that can tear your thoughts into two polar opinions has to be a great story.
Each character’s story has something endearing about it. Each story is believable, each is very much possible, if you ask me. Each story could happen to you. Or people around you. For example, the love story of a guy madly in love with a woman that his friend is getting married to. Its like a typical one sided love that most Indian men (at least me) have fallen into. The guy doesnt have the balls to admit his love for the woman, for whatever reasons. But then he finally comes out of the closet and admits his love for the woman. It has to be amongst the most beautifully penned and shot proposal scenes that I’ve ever seen. Without a doubt.
Then there are other stories, of a writer who finds love in a house maid who cant speak English (the third best story in my opinion), a school kid who is infatuated with a classmate, even the British PM who falls for a staffer at his residence, an office romance between an old boss and a young secretary. Every story has a nice ring to it. Each story is well thought, well crafted, well written. Each story is better than most full length features that we create in the name of cinema in India.
Its a beautifully written movie. For the love of reading, I would love to read it as a book, more than a movie.
I would love to talk about production value, direction, music etc but then its one of those movies that indulge you so much that you seem to ignore everything. At least I did. I wouldnt want to talk about those things and spoil the gooey warm melted chocolate feeling that even talking about the movie induces in me. Gooey warm melted chocolate – wtf am I high on?
So, yeah, its one of those movies that you just can not miss. If you haven’t seen it yet, please do YOURself a favour and go see it. Its totally worth your time.
And anyway, Christmas is just around the corner. You ought to take out time and watch it, even if you dont like movies. If you do, trust me love will take an entirely new meaning. And to end the review, like The Troggs‘ say, “I feel it in my fingers, I feel it in my toes // Love is all around me, and the feeling grows“, ladies and gentlemen, let go and let the feelings grow.
P.S. Starting 1 Dec, I would attempt to make another streak of one post a day. And 1000 words a day. December is a tough month, I need to finish tnks and another compilation of short stories that I am working on. But I shall try and write everyday. If you dont see a post a day in December, please point out.
P.P.S.: I had decided that I would not talk about sgMS. But the movie, on a long trans-Atlantic flight, made me miss her like crazy. So crazy that if I had an option, I would have jumped off the plane, waded through the waters, walked over mountains, braved seasons to knock on her door and and ask her out fr a dinner.
Yesterday, I finally saw Gravity. The movie. I had to watch it. Everyone on my Twitter timeline, my Facebook has been talking about it. And not just talking, raving about it. And how.
Everyone said its the best movie to have come out of Hollywood, ever. EVER. Better than all the other movies that I know are great but couldn’t appreciate. Better than all other love stories, better than all those car chases, better than those animated ones, better than those thrillers, better than anyone and everyone. Peer pressure. Sigh.
Plot
So, coming back, the movie is about a bunch of astronauts who are up there, in space, and working on a space station. Something goes wrong and the ship they are on, is destroyed. The story is about these astronauts, who despite their respective personal demons, try to survive and make their way back to Mother Earth. Against all odds. That’s it. Pretty simple story. I am surprised that I could narrate it all in one line. How often can you do that for a movie?
The Good and The Bad
Coming to the good and bad bits, there isn’t much to write about. After all, we just have two actors (George Clooney and Sandra Bullock), some voices and a few dead bodies as the entire cast.
The few bits that I loved in the film, I’d talk about those. But its going to be a spoiler. Read at your own peril. One of the scenes when Sandra Bullock manages to get inside a ship, in zero gravity, she curls up like a baby. I loved that scene. To me, it was like a new birth for her. Against all odds. And when she is on Earth and she is trying to come out of water, to me it was like evolution. The way sea creatures would have stumbled on Earth. Loved the direction. Loved the acting. Loved these two sequences.
Apart from this, I am not sure what to write / talk about from the film. There were some interesting lessons. The ones about loneliness on space, fear of the unknown et al but to be honest, I personally find those very depressing. May be because I need people around me all the time. I am as social as us humans come. I’d skip over those parts.
Verdict
Despite my disappointment with the film, if you do decide to see it, please do so in 3D. Because it has some of the finest footage on space. I am assuming its all computer generated but it is so breathtaking that you ought to watch it. In a cinema hall with a large screen. And in 3D.
There, I recommended Gravity as well. Like everyone else on my timeline and wall. But not for the movie or the story, but for the brilliant documentary that it would have made.
In the end, if I was to rate this as a film, I’d say its average. If I was to rate this as a documentary about space, I’d say its poor (for all the factual errors in it). If I was to rate this as a visual delight, I would give it full marks. I would say is exceptional.
P.S.: And here is an idea for film makers. I sincerely believe that if you can create content documentaries as beautiful as Gravity, you can actually get audiences to come to cinemas and pay a lot of money. All we need is someone to stake the documentary makers. May be I would, some day!
So I finally saw Vicky Donor, the movie that everyone cant stop talking about. Here is the review!
The plot.
The movie is about a typical young Punjabi guy from Delhi. Like all young Punjabi guys in Delhi, he is jobless, clueless and spends his time in bed, cricket field, malls, clubs and other such places of pleasure. And like all Punjabi guys, he can talk fast and knows all the slang that we use in Delhi.
One fine day when life was hunky dory and he was whiling away time, he stumbles upon an opportunity to donate his sperm and make some quick buck. Apprehensive in the beginning, he eventually gets around and starts enjoying the riches that her sperm gets him. Riches include Plasma TV, a “blue” bedroom, lava lamps, neon bulbs, cash etc.
Then, like all Bollywood movies, he falls in love and gets married. The twist in the tale is that that the man who’s been playing the mythical stork, donating sperm to the entire world and showering them with babies, cant have a baby of his own because the leading lady cant conceive for some reason.
And then something happens, followed by something else and some more something elses. The story starts dragging, dragging, dragging and dragging. And eventually the movie ends.
The good
Few character are brilliantly written. And brilliantly enacted. No, no the leading gentleman or the lady. But Dr. Chaddha, Pepsi Aunty, Mrs. Arora, DaadiJi, the desperate friend. I could totally relate to all of them (no, I dont have any such characters living next door but they are believable and familiar for some reason).
Then, there are few shots that are gorgeous, for want of a better word. They havent made a tourist movie out of Delhi or Kolkatta but some bit is shot outdoor and its been shot well. I particularly love a scene where the heroine is sitting on a bus stop and is crying. Its a visual treat, the way it has been shot. I wish it was slightly longer. I couldn’t seem to have enough of it.
And when they get married, the wedding song is hilarious. I have always wanted a court marriage for myself but after I saw that wedding scene, I am very sure I want to have a Punjabi wedding with cars stacked with “whiskey”! Must must see this bit.
The bad
The story in the second half could have been MUCH MUCH better. I cant digest the sudden anger, departure for Kolkatta, reconciliation for a mere party of an acquaintance, even more sudden dispersal of all the pent up anger and the they-lived-happily-ever-after ending. More thought would have made the story more convincing.
The final word.
I would give the movie a 2.5 on 5. Rest upto you. Go see it. The part before the interval is really nice and it does make you laugh. And no, its not thought provoking at all. And no, no comments on the acting skills of the hero or the heroine.
