#openLetters

Letter 01 – 27 Oct 2018. Hello World!

So ~~this~~ yesterday morning, I saw a tweet about someone (a group of people actually) that sends regular emails to their subscribers and one of the recipients of the emails had sent that tweet. That appreciation tweet said something like “you do a great job”, “its become a daily habit to open the email”, “we become better when we read your emails”.

And like most times when I see a good idea, I tend to copy that? I HAD to copy this one as well! To me this looked like an opportunity to write everyday and improve.

So, I hereby promise that I will write one letter everyday. Here is the one for day.

Dear whoever is reading this,

So yesterday, I made a promise to myself that I will write a letter everyday to whoever may want to read it. Just that there is no agenda or nothing specific that I want to talk about in these daily letters. Just that I like it when I write, I get that peace of mind. Writing is my catharsis. It gives me some relief from the largely dreary and dreamy life that I lead. And more importantly, most times I write, it teaches me new things. For example, I did not even know the meaning of catharsis till the word automatically wrote itself and I had to look up for the meaning. Yes. It wrote itself. Its funny how subconscious mind works. More on this in one of the subsequent letters. For the time being, getting back to the letter.

Thank you for agreeing to receive these letters. For “creators” like me, its the patrons like you that keep us going. If not for you, who would I write for? I may argue that writing doesnt have to serve any other purpose than the writing itself. But then, I am human. And I need validation. And I need some sort of gratification (even if its in my head that someone out there is consuming what I create).

Also, writing allows me to connect with people. Both known or unknown. In fact thats the mix of recipients on this email. Out of four people that I am sending this to, 3 are friends and one is a stranger. I am hoping as I get regular with these, I will get to know more unknowns. And the knowns will know me better. So, in one word, I get to grow my tribe!

The other thing about writing is that it gives me the illusion that I am creating something. And to me, creating is THE thing that I want to stand for. Right now. In the past, I have stood for ambition, material wealth, fame and or impact. Right now, I want to stand for creation. When I say I stand for something, I mean that each of my action is guided by creating. I want to create. I want to support other creators. I want to live in the company of creators. I want to have the creator’s mindset. Even if its crap, I want to create. In fact, if I can help you create something, please do let me know. And even though I advocate marketing, I know when to be discreet. Whatever we discuss stays with me.

I also want to use these letters as a mechanism to seek feedback on various things that I create. I will share things here before I share elsewhere and seek your inputs. Feedback. Whatever.

These letters will also be like a scratchpad to talk about things that clutter my head. These could be ideas that I am working on, thoughts that are making my head go into a spin, issues that affect me, the revolution that I want to bring about and so on and so forth.

If you think about it, these things are actually the things that you write about on your blog. But there is tiny difference. On a blog, once you publish something, the onus is the recipient’s to open the browser, read and feed you back. Thats a million steps of friction. On the letter, however, its a thing that is in your mailbox. Its a thing that is screaming for your attention. Its a thing that you feel compelled to act on. I know some people who have the OCD of opening every email that comes their way. A letter thus ensures that I get access to others. So letters are indeed better 🙂

Finally, this allows me to get into a new habit that two dear friends (Krishna – https://twitter.com/cunfusia and Harshit – harshitsaran.wordpress.com) have been trying to hard to put me into. Lets see if I can keep the habit going and redeem the efforts of Krishna and Harshit.

Thats about it for day 1. As I end this, I have a favour to seek. Two actually.
A, Please do tell me what could I write about tomorrow.
B, And if you had to forward this email to EXACTLY three people, who would those people be? In fact forward it to them. Ask them to “subscribe” to my letters by sending me an email?

Finally, the day you wish to stop getting these, please do tell me and I would unsubscribe you and remove you from the list.

Till the next one,

Thanks,
@saurabh

PS: I know that this letter does not really add value to anyone right now. This is more of a rant of an old man. But with time, I will figure out the magic formula that will ensure that its worth the time!

Oh, if you want to get these on email, please send me your email address. And yes, your privacy is as important to me as mine is. I promise to not share your interest, details etc with anyone else.

Thank you!

Writing Off!

Alert. This is a ranty post. Why am I writing this? Because I dont know what else to do about this. I ~~want~~ HAVE to talk about this to someone and get the load off my head. Ideally, talk with a life partner or a business partner. I dont have either. I mean I do have business partners but none of them have any place for emotions in their heads. I also have a few friends and mentors that can lend a patient ear but I am not sure if they understand the battle I go though on a daily basis. Neither do I know if they understand what I am upto in life. I could vent out on the Facebook and twitter but I am not sure what purpose will that serve in all the cacophony around. For that matter, I am not sure what purpose will this blog serve. Once I publish, I will probably forget. But thats the point I guess. To vent out and move on. Here goes.

So, this stint of working for myself, I started in the Feb of 2015. As I write this, I complete three years of being on my own. And its been one helluva ride. There have been one or two ups and a lot of downs. Its definitely been a great learning experience. Truth be told, I am not really doing that great (compared to how Id be doing if I were working for someone else) but as I think back, I dont think theres anything else that I would have done. There are no regrets, if I may.

However, if I had an option to go back, I would undo a lot of things. Things like never working for someone without taking an advance.

And thats what the rant is about. Stay with me.

In the last three years I must have worked on 20 large projects and about 10 clients (both big and small). And out of those there are 3 clients and 3 large projects that I did NOT get paid for. And I am talking about serious money. About 11 lakhs. In sunk cost and opportunity cost. It may not look like a lot of money to you guys, but to me, its big. Big as in B I G.

The point of this post is to tell myself that I ought to write those off. And write an open letter of sorts to people who get work done and do not pay.

So, here I am. Officially and finally, writing the payment off. I dont really want to name the companies (or the people). Neither do I want to talk about the circumstances which lead to me not getting paid. But there is this thing that I do want to put forth.

Thing is, I am someone who doesnt really have an easily monetizable skill. I am NOT a designer, coder, photographer, fashion blogger, singer, drummer, rich heiress, son of businessman, baker, chef, make-up artiste or anything like that. These people are blessed in the sense that they can make a living whenever they choose and wherever they choose.

Neither am I a career professional who’s spent years in a certain industry (or a discipline) with large companies and thus has a CV that can get a super cushy job. Most of my friends from MDI fall in this category.

What I am is a hustler. What is a hustler? You dont know? Stop reading right now. Close the browser. Leave.

People like me, the hustlers, are often the Jacks of all trades. We are aggregators have no marketable skill and often have to fake what we do. We rely on services of others, often working with make-shift teams and arrangements, trying to deliver a great product (or a service) that makes the customer choose us over other more “established” businesses. If I may use a better word, people like me have to hustle and hustle hard to make the ends meet.

And why? For ofcourse the independence. And to make ends meet while hoping that things we do, work on, they add up. Add up bit is important. What do I mean by adding up? That someday all the work we’ve done, all that we’ve been through gives us enough name, clout, attention, contacts, relationships, ideas that we can go make that dent in the universe.

So yeah. As long as you get work that adds up, work that continues to pay you and keep the engine going, all is well.

Till the time a client fucks up on the money that is promised to you.

After all, every rupee earned is a tiny step towards that dent. And every rupee lost is a roadblock. When a client decides to not pay, for whatever reasons, they put a roadblock on the path to my progress. In fact I’d say I am dragged back 10 steps – after all, to take up a project I had to let go of other opportunities. No? The other opportunities could mean working on a different project. Could mean that that book I’ve always wanted to write will have to take the back seat. Why? To earn bread!

In fact, by not paying you dont just put a dent in an individuals meticulous plan for life. But you are an impediment to the whole notion of Karma itself. When you dont pay, you stop, you pull back people like me from realizing their life goals.

You know, the most important commodity is time. And when I invest time… Wait. I dont “invest” time. I “exchange” my time with a client’s money. And in this implicit contract, once I have done my part of the deal, I expect and its probably fair for them to hold up their part. And pay up.

But often, they dont. And when that happen that sucks. You are way too small to fight and argue and you’d rather move on. Its just sad.

What makes it worse is that people like me do not belong to the entitled class. We are not big corporations for sure. Neither do we have bankers or VCs on our side to look out for what we work on. More often than not, its an individual like me, trying to hustle hard. To do things, add up and make that dent in the universe.

The simple act of momentarily selfishness by a client stops the wheel of life. And thats not a cool thing to do. No?

So, dear big companies, rich men and other such people, next time you get someone like me to do something, please PLEASE PLEASE pay up! For you its probably loose change. But for someone like me, it could be a shot at a better life.

Thank you!

P.S.: Here’s a pledge. I WILL always pay once I have agreed on a number. Even if you take me for a ride, you dont deliver, you do shoddy work, you dont meet expectations, I am willing to understand and give you that extra chance. After all if people like me will not pay it forward, who will?

Dear Steve,

A friend asked me, “if you were to write to Elon Musk about your aspirations and ambitions and what you want to do in life, how would you?”

This blogpost is in response to that. But before that, few caveats.

I will NOT write to Elon. Rather, I would email Steve. Thing is, the outcome and vision and purpose-driven approach of Elon is fascinating and exciting. But Steve, the legend, is what is inspiring. I love the fact that he was a hustler (compared to an Elon that is a tinkerer).
I’d assume that ambition is personal, more tangible. And aspiration is little more altruist. Read more here.

So, here’s the letter.

Dear Steve,

Thank you.

For being who you ~~were~~ are. And being an inspiration that makes me want to do more and make that dent. Or ding. Or whatever.

It is you who taught me that our actions must create consequences. Consequences that are larger than self. Larger than our imagination.

It’s by following you (and your actions and your words) over the years that I have understood my limitations. And I have found ways and means to overcome those limitations. I still suck at getting things done but I am getting there. All thanks to you.

Thanks to you, I know that the only thing that limits us, is our imagination. You taught me how to think big. You taught me to take tiny steps and keep at it till you reach there. You showed me the power of setting lofty goals and challenging what we thought was possible. Thank you, Steve.

Steve, I write to you to seek a favour. Will you please indulge me? I want to talk about what my aspirations are. And I want to talk about my ambitions and what I want to do in life.

Steve, when I look at the world around me, I see so much potential getting wasted in frivolous things. Things that dont add up. Things that dont add value. Things that dont create. Lemme give you an example. Today, I was coming back from work in a train and I saw a young couple arguing about a mobile game. And they were stuck on the game for the 20 minutes it took the train to reach my destination. And they werent happy. What if they could use that time to learn a new thing (by seeing a TED talk, or by reading a book or by watching a tutorial or something). Or at least debate about how they’s plan their finances!

The world would be such a better place if that happened.

You know that’s what I want to work on. Make people more aware about our limited time here. You talked about in your Stanford address. I was lucky to have seen it. Someone needs to talk to them as well. And inspire them to do more with their time. Of course someone may argue that its all pointless (we die, our kids die, our kids’s kids and the world will eventually come to an end and all that we stand for, all that we create will amount to nothing) but I know that while we are alive, when people are creating, they are lost in the work. They get in the flow and the flow is the closest that it comes to Nirvana. The little things that make life miserable cease to exist when you are creating. Reminds you to Carl’s Pale Blue Dot.

Life suddenly starts looking so much better. No?

This, Steve, is my aspiration. This is what I really want to do. Its fuzzy AF. The fuzziest thing that I’ve ever thought about. But I believe that there’s merit.

And what is my ambition?

I want to push limits.

Physical, mental, emotional. And at other levels that us humans can experience.

I know that I am not sorted in the head. There are times when I am elated that I am jumping with joy for no reason and there are times when I so sad that I just want to sleep. But Steve, most days when I wake up, the world does look like a great, inspiring place. Life looks like a “journey” that is worth taking. There are so many people doing so many things that you thought humans were incapable of. Look at Elon. Wait. Look at Wright Brothers or whoever made the first aircraft. They allowed us to fly. Look at Elon. He will not rest till he has colonised Mars!

While I want to push limits, Steve, I know that I am a drifter. I’ve never had the clarity in terms of where I want to end up. I also know that I dont have one specific talent that I can dig at till I make that dent. I am a proverbial Jack of all trades and I am happy being one. Thing is, I love this drifting. I love that I can walk the surface of a lot of disciplines. I know this is best suited for someone with a lot of money. But its ok. I will make my money. Ok, I am drifting while writing the letter. Coming back. Steve I want to push limits and in the process, inspire others.

In fact, lately, I have started to realise that I get immense happiness and satisfaction and I sleep well at night when I am able to inspire others. And help others. And enable others. Enabling. Thats where the Gold is. Thats what I want to do. Enable.

Now enabling is too broad. If I were to put enabling in a box, I’d say I want to enable a billion people to live better lives.

Billion people.

Better Lives.

And how do I define better? Well, better means that if they are poor, I enable them to live in relative comfort and happiness. If they are unhappy, I put on the red ball on my nose and dance for them. If they need access to opportunities, I want to give them that. If they need inspiration to do more, I want to inspire them.

I want to be the thing, the jester, the platform that enables people to be better. I hope you get the drift.

One of the ways in which I can do this, is by doing amazing things and by doing em so well that I inspire people. To do more. To #bebetter. And to #livebetter, and #workbetter.

So, my second aspiration, if I may have more than one, is to make the world a better place. And do it by enabling people to be better versions of themselves. And while I become the enabler, my life (where I achieve a set of seemingly super-tough goals — each goal must push human limits, such as, make a billion dollars, run a marathon in less than 4 hours, live till 120 and more) and my actions and my conduct become a source of inspiration. Just like your life was, Steve.

Thats about it I guess. Phew.

Thanks for reading.

Your’s Faithfully,
Saurabh Garg

PG04,

With age, I am turning into a sentimental fool! How do I know? I sent the following email to my batchmates from MDI. Read.

Dear PG04,

Wait!

When was the last time someone called us PG04? When we all got placed? Or the last time the faculty addressed us? Or was it when we had our convocation? Or was it in one of those emails that one of us sends to each other once in a while?

This PG04 to me (atleast) had a really strong connotation. This to me was the call to our wolfpack (see Hangover if you haven’t), call to our brethren, call to the family (Godfather) that separated us from them. Us was PG04. Them was everyone else including PG03, PG05, Faculty, Hostel cooks, the security guards, the professors and the companies coming on campus to hire us. And others were people not on campus like the world beyond the college walls, the families back home and so on and so forth. At MDI, we were all we had. Ok, exaggerating. I made it sound like we were in a concentration camp. May be we were. It was a wild world out there and we had to emerge from MDI as Change Masters. To give credit to the salutation of our hostel, some of us have did become Change Masters!

But over years the wolfpacks have dismantled, families have gone to the mattresses, other pressing matters such as buying houses, acquiring corner offices, raising kids et at have taken precedence. We’ve gone busy with our respective lives. So much so that we cant meet even if we live 3 KMs away from each other (pointing accusatory glances at Ridhima and Ketan – I live 3 KMs away and we’ve been making plans for three months). What has remained is faint memories of times spent at MDI. And there were tons of incidents that I probably will never forget.

The beauty is, each of us would have had our own sets of memories to look back at. And the sad bit is, none of us would ever discover all the stories that went around back then! May be someone has to catalog all these into one journal? May be I will at some point.

I can share my story to start with. When I walked into MDI, I had no clue what was in store for me. I came from a small college in a remote corner of Delhi and everything about MDI was intimidating to me – the ones I was talking to on a yahoo group (before college started) went to fancy colleges, were sons of army colonels and so on and so forth. My roommate, Pochu, was topper from BITS Pilani. The dudes next to me in class – Satya and Gupta – were so brainy that I had no idea where to look at where stuff was happening in the class. Right in front of me was Piyush who was so tall that I had to stand on my chair to make sense of stuff happening on the blackboard. The first friend I made at MDI was Ashish who literally lived in the library the whole of first semester. Despite being the odd one out (I still am come to think of it), with time I found my place. I became a part of “us.” I discovered things that made me happy – reading, counter-strike, music, spreading myself too thin, staying up at night, travel and of course, writing. I learnt that I was not the king of the universe. And I made friends that probably will last for a lifetime!

Thing is, if I did not go to MDI, I probably wouldn’t have discovered any of these and I would have been a far different person from what I am today.

Wait a minute. So, why this email?

Because (Vivek) Gawri told me that it’s been exactly 10 years since we passed out! Ten fucking years (and almost 12 since we started). I can’t say it feels like yesterday but time does fly away. While at campus those two years seemed like eternity and now 10 years are insignificant.

Back then, when I was joining MDI, like someone starting a new phase in life (see Shawshank), I was super excited – after all I was going to MDI! And I was afraid of the unknown. I was clueless about what was expected from me – MDI to me was (and is) the most decorated tag that I’ve earned. I was dreamy eyed – I remember I wanted to be like Bill Gates and make money (of course I am nowhere close). And I was apprehensive. I had no glass globes to gaze into and predict what would become of me in 10 years.

In fact, I remember getting asked a million times, “Where do you see yourself in 10 years.”
I dont recall what I’d said but there’s a high probability that I would have said, “I’d be the CEO of a large organization.” Talk of wishful thinking!

BTW, what did you say? And are you any close to what you thought you were gonna be doing in ten years?

And may be, just may be, today is the time to plan for the next 10 years. What would you be doing on Mar 16, 2026?

Me? Well, I would be living on a sparsely populated location (if there is one left till then) and I would be a teacher. And a writer. Please be my guest if you visit the city I am in. And do buy my books ;P

So, here the deal. Lets come together? Meet each other? If not meet everyone else, may be come back to meet your friends that you spend so many countless nights with, on the dome, on the steps of the hostel, the acad block, library, computer centre and of course behind the closed doors of rooms 😉

So what if we are older now? I am sure there is some fire left in the belly. And that little fire finally succumbs to a slow, painful, nondescript death brought about by years of monotony, how about a meet up? I am sure there will be reasons, excuses, spouses, deadlines, missed connections, red-eyes and all that troubling your brains but it would be fun!

Guys, time does flies (Tomorrow never dies) and it goes away fast. Next time I send something like this out, we probably would be 20 years out of MDI and as Sharma told Gawri, “it would be a miracle if we are alive by then.” Lets do this. For you. And for I. And for us.

Thats’ it guys.

Oh, one more thing! Thank you for such an amazing time at MDI. Whatever little I know, whatever little I do, all of it has happened because I was lucky enough to be at MDI and more lucky to have you for company.

Love, Regards and Headshots
Saurabh “MML | h!+m4n” Garg

P.S.: Thanks to Gawri for reminding me that we’re ten years out of college and Ketan for confirming. And guess I’ve seen too many movies.

I have set this form on Google where I am asking you for your location and contact details. Please do fill in if you are keen. https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1hDAfjywcF0r6UPgxToB-R58lxSpScNPFPkpx9YxYmr4/viewform

Book 2 – Update – Apologies

~~After the phenomenal success of #tnks, I get a million emails everyday – each asking me about the status of my next book.~~

When I published #tnks, I promised myself that I will publish one book every year. 2015 was to see my second book. But 6 months in the year, I am not sure if the book is coming out. So, if you are disappointed, I am sorry.

And I promise I will continue to write. I will continue to work on my craft. I will continue to improve my storytelling. And in 2016, I will deliver something that will make you happy. And proud. For sure. I promise.

So the delay is for multiple reasons. Like other things, if you follow this blog, here is a list.

A. My laziness. Writing a book is about discipline. Its about writing 1000 words everyday. At least. And more if you want the book to be interesting. For #tnks I wrote that many words. Every day. For few months. And then there was time I spent on editing. This time around, thanks to my laziness I haven’t written anything per se.

B. Roti, Kapda aur Makaan. You’d know that I refuse to hold a steady job. And I depleted all my savings while I worked on #tnks. So this time around, I have had to put in a lot of time to make enough money to afford the fancy lifestyle I was used to. I know I know. There are people who work three jobs and yet get time to write. Salute to them. I dont have what it takes to do that. I cant live below a certain standard and still write. I am not crazy enough. Yet. May be when I am older.

C. Lack of focus. I have made a gazillion starts and I am not happy with any of those. I even wrote some 20K words for one of the plots but I am not sure I want to tell that story (the one based in Goa). However I now think I have something that I want to write about. Of course I will write crime but not that pop-culture kinds. I want to write serious, western crime. The kinds that gets converted into movies. Lets see if I have it in me. Lets see how it unfolds. Lets see if the story intrigues me enough to make me finish it by end of this year. If you really want to read the next thing, please pray that story keeps me hooked enough.

D. Lack of motivation. While the response to #tnks to has generally been very encouraging, it hasnt made me a literary star. And I am the kinds who needs external motivation to get things done. I know I like writing and all that but I really needed people to praise me for what I had cooked with tnks. And it hasnt happened. I mean I get fanmail and all that. But the numbers are dismal. The number is far from 1000 true fans that KK talks about. May be it takes time to get to that number of fans. May be not. I will never know. Unless I write the next book. No?

I am sure there are more reasons but I can come up with just these for the time being.

I think what I really need is someone to give me a big fat wad of money so that I may just sit there and write. May be once I get that money, I will become lazier and fatter and not write at all. May be its not about money at all. May be its about that zabardat toofan that I think Faiz talked about? May be. May be not.

Any how, hope you guys dont abandon me after reading this. Like I said before, it’s people like you who support people like me to go forth and chase hard-to-get dreams like writing a book.

Thank you for supporting me.

Regards,
Saurabh Garg
July 2015

Oh, one more thing. The page for Book 2 is up already on FB. To be honest it doesn’t really help but its something that everyone does. And I am not cool enough to not do things that the world does. So, in case you want to “like” it already without seeing the book, please, be my guest!

Thanks!

Dear RedBull,

Clicked sometime in 2013. As part of #100HappyDays. More pics here.

Dear RedBull,

Thank you.

Thank you for giving me wings. I dont know what I would do without you.

You are one of those few brands (businesses) that has never ever disappointed me. I love you for your consistent performance. You live up to the promise that you make. You are someone I can bank on. With your always on delivery, you have earned my faith. So much so that if you fuck up, I am willing to excuse you. After all, none of is God and everyone makes mistakes.

In fact when I take a class in marketing and branding, I often start with you (I have one before the class and in the class I start talking with your example)

From the deck I use in my branding class.

You know, you have seen me enjoying the best of times (Imperium at MDI, road trips with friends – Neo, sgMS and others), worst of times (the depressive phase of my bipolar disorder) and everything in between. You are the rock that has always been around when I’ve needed some support (just like Agony Aunt – VK08May).

I have often been unwell and I’ve just need one swig at you to get back to my feet. Today is a case in point. I was supposed to get up early in the morning (~6) and work on my next book. I did wake up but I could not get out of my bed. And when I finally got up, it was well after 10 and that depressive streak held me hostage all over again. Until I had a Red Bull. And after that, I did my 30 minutes of guitar practice, wrote some for my book, worked on a deck that has been pending forever. And did a few things that I have been delaying for a few days, for no reason.

In fact in the past as well, you have been instrumental in helping me do my work as an event manager. So much so that I could not work without you by my side. You are one of the 7 things that us event managers cant live without. Remember all those shows where you’ve rested on the console while I was assisting Suvi in running the shows? Remember how I ask him to shut up at times (despite his obvious seniority and more experience) and let me make the decisions? If not for you, I wont have had the balls to ask him to trust me and let me handle the situation! Trust me!

More than just work, you have given me the strength to stay up at night and work on my book when Sachin had put me under scary deadlines. I hate him for that. And I love you for allowing me to sail over the deadlines. Of course the book hasn’t made me famous or rich. But thank you for being there. Thank you for the help. Sachin, if you’re reading this, you better not push me like this for next one.

And then there have been times when my ultra conservative folks have questioned if you were an alcoholic beverage. Because you are priced at a premium. And you had me seriously addicted. I had a tough time explaining to them that you were an “energy” drink and it was safe, as long as I consumed you in “moderation”. Well, moderation is a subjective word. No?

Finally, the greatest part of my fandom is because of all the awesome marketing that you guys engage in. As a marketer and someone who wants to go down in history books as David and Leo, I have super amazing respect for your marketing methods. I mean who else could have thought of sending someone up in Stratosphere to jump! Or creating a damn racing team. Or those crazy things that you often cook up! I often tell people that if you want to learn marketing, all you need to do is look at how Red Bull goes about it and decode the method behind your madness.

You know, come to think of it, I owe a lot to you. And I ought to have Red Bull more often. Just that I am trying to be healthy. May be I can cut on Coke and binge on Red Bull when I crave for a beverage. May be. Let’s see.

More later. Till then,

Love,
Saurabh “high on Red Bull” Garg

Dear sgMS

Dear sgMS,

Hope you are doing great. Wherever you are.

Hope you are happy and healthy. Hope you are in love and you’re getting your fix of attention and affection. Hope you’re doing great work that makes you happy and your friends proud. ~~Hope all the emo baggage that SG piles up on you is no longer yours to carry~~.

You konw, to be honest, I dint mean to write in to you. I remember my promise of staying away. And I have stayed away for a large part. Even when I have needed you, even when I could do with your company, even when I knew that no one else but you can give me comfort. I’ve stayed away.

You know, I dont really have a reason to write to you. Just that I miss you
terribly. I miss you so so much that I dont know what to do. It’s
stifling. It’s suffocating. I can’t breathe. I mean I can but it seems like a task. And there
is no reason to make the effort. Who do I do all the things for? You are my reason babes. I want to make your proud. I want to make you happy. Without you, what would I do with things when I dont have you to shower those on?

I tried to not write this letter. I drugged myself and tried to sleep but I could not. I tried to drown myself in work but I could not deliver. I tried to divert attention on television, poker, readign but I just couldn’t concentrate. I am human sgMS and this time it got better of me. I had to speak to you.

I sent you frantic messages, emails, calls and tried everything to reach you. And I realized that you have blocked me out. I know you dont have any hard feelings per se and you’re doing this so that I drift away with time and I get used to living without you.

Of course your methods are flawed and this separation from you is making me crave for your company all the more. So much so that I am staring at the pics from good old times when we were together.

I really really want you around. I know repeating a word does not make it stronger or better. But there is no other way I know to express myself. I really want you around me. And I want to be around you. I just can’t do without you. I know I am being selfish. And I know you hate selfish people. But I dont know what else to say. I dont want to lie to you. I want you and I want you bad.

Judge me if you will.

But, but… please please come back! I promise I try really hard to not disappoint you.

Please?

Love always,
SG

Dear Chetan Bhagat

Dear Chetan,

First things first. Let me get a few confessions out of the way.

A, I have not read any of your books and yet I have seen your popularity and sales figure soar with every title you come up with.

B, the only rendezvous I’ve had with you was when I was working as an event manager. I came within breathing distance of you when I was trying to put a mic on your jacket, moments before you were to go up on a stage and address a gathering for the a motivational lecture. Oh, you seem to have done a brilliant job of delivering the lecture. Because after you were done, I heard enthusiastic and loud applause from the audience. Alas, I could not hear you deliver your lecture because I was running around to get the next act ready.

C, I am yet to meet anyone who has shown fondness for what you write or how your write. But for some reason, everyone I know has an opinion or two about you. And that sir, is no mean feat.

Chetan, I write to you to thank you for giving me the courage to quit my day job and wade in uncertain waters while I chased my dreams of being a published author. If not for your success, I couldn’t have done it.

Please indulge me as I go back in time. I first heard of you sometime in the later half of 2004. I was a first-year MBA student at a leading business school – MDI Gurgaon. Since it is a college of repute, students were expected to be good with academics and be well rounded. Those days, reading was regarded as a great way to “build CV value” when the placements happened. So I picked up reading.

I tried different genres. And by trial and error I settled on and fell in love with winding and layered tales of injustice, crimes, murders and the common-man-doing-uncommon-dares-in-face-of-adversity spun by the likes Jeffery Archer, John Grisham, Sue Grafton and others. What more, I often found myself lost into day dreams of creating such plots and stories myself.

Even though I had faith in my abilities and a fire in my belly, I was not sure if I could actually become an author. How could I? After all, I came from a humble background and English to me was, what can I say, intimidating! To me, English was something that only the elite could indulge in, in their fancy, lavish dinner parties. Lingua Britannica was something as exclusive as an admission to your alma matter – the IITs and the IIMs.

The writers and the readers of content created in English had to be special. I mean look at the bestseller list in India from Oct of 2004. Giving you company on those charts are greats like Dan Brown, Amitav Ghosh, Paulo Coelho, Robin Sharma, Mitch Albom, Khushwant Singh, Pawan Verma and others. All these authors have a pedigree that I could give an arm and a leg for. Each of them is read by and discussed by those socialites in their fancy Page 3 parties. And like most things they mulled over in their parties, I could hardly comprehend the language, the depth, the richness, the detail, the pain, the suffering, the longing and other such things that their books talked about.

You, Chetan, were like a whiff of fresh air in an old room full of yellowing books that hadn’t seen sunlight in years. You presence on the list dispelled the famous notion that writing was a serious business; and the notion that you had to be, if not a doctorate in literature, a post-graduate at least to even think about writing.

In fact more I read about the publishing business in those days, more I realize that if I had approached a publisher back then with my manuscript, they would’ve laughed on me. I probably would not even get to enter their grand, opulent offices. On top of it, back then, there were hardly any publishers. And most of them probably believed that they were the custodians of English language. In today’s parlance, we call them the Grammar Nazis.

Fast forward to the Oct of 2014. The tribe of these Grammar Nazis is fast headed towards extinction. The remaining, handful Grammar aficionados are hardly given any importance by anyone. There are more publishers than there are authors. Even foreign publishers have set up shops in India and they regularly publish books by authors like you. And I. Literary agents, and good ones at that, are now dime a dozen. Experienced editors are willing to work with newer authors without expecting a fortune for their editing talent. Great designers are willing to work for next to nothing. Modern trends like self-publishing and social media have unleashed a new crop of writers and given them cheap innovative ways to reaching their audience.

The publishing industry as we knew it traditionally had changed. And Chetan, you ushered this change. Your success made this change possible.

Unchanged however remains your presence on the bestsellers lists. Or may I you’re your dominance? On the latest list of bestsellers in India, you are accompanied by the likes of Paulo Coelho, Sachin Tendulkar and Boria Majumdar. And then there are authors like Preeti Shenoy, Ravinder Singh and Durjoy Dutta.

Sachin is an exception here because it’s his autobiography and it would probably be his only book in life. Apart from Boria (who co-authored Sachin’s book), I am not sure if any one else on the list has a background in literature or journalism.

The Ravinders, The Durjoys and others like them are not yet in their thirties and they command a fan following as large as established Bollywood or Cricket celebrities. Each book they come up with, is much-anticipated and celebrated by their fans. Without your influence I bet they wouldn’t have even considered writing as a career.

You know Chetan, you not only gave the Ravinders and Durjoys the confidence to go forth and write, you gave me a precedent that I could share with my family when I decided to quit. I could tell my friends that I was going to be an author like you and no one raised even an eyebrow. I could talk my employer into granting me a leave without pay for a period of one year. Your success gave me a plausible justification for switching careers after almost 10 years of work. The world around me questioned my sanity but because I had your success as an example, they eventually acquiesced.

There is more Chetan. You also helped create an entire ecosystem. Because of phenomenal success of your books and non-stop inflow of money pouring into your coffers, new publishers, distributors, designers, editors, reviewers sprang up. All of them attempting to ride the wave, the avalanche of new authors pounding on the doors of impending boom in the publishing industry.

As one such writer, an author, I shall remain indebted to you forever for your seminal work, 5 Point Someone. It started the avalanche that we all are hoping to be a part of. You have proved beyond doubt that English language and literature is no longer a slave to the modern and the rich and the famous. Isn’t that what you are reinforcing in your latest book, Half Girlfriend?

Chetan, Thank you so much! For giving wings to a common man like me to chase my ten-year old dream. And for helping create an ecosystem where the dream could actually see light of the day! You are the knight in the shining armor for dreamers like me. If not for you, my dream would’ve remained a mere thought bubble. I would’ve gone through life without realizing my true passion, my potential.

Thank you once again!

Saurabh Garg
Author, The Nidhi Kapoor Story

Oh, would you have time to read my first book? I would love to send a copy. Please do let me know.

Note: An edited version of this letter appeared on qz.com at http://qz.com/315668/dear-chetan-bhagat-i-quit-my-job-and-became-a-writer-because-of-you/

Help Me!

I sent this email to a few friends and strangers. Seeking help. The version below is an edited one; after I got feedback from some who chose to respond. If you want to help me as well, please do let me know.

Hi,

Most of you know me. The ones who don’t, I met / spoke / interacted with you while I was working on my first book – The Nidhi Kapoor Story. In a couple of cases, you read the book and wrote in. In one case, you are a friend of a friend and you’ve liked what I wrote. And one of you is a person who reads my blog (yay)!

I write to you because I need help.

I have realized that writing makes me happy and if I can get better at it, I can work on my terms, actually make a living out of it and get out of the rat-race. And not just living, I could live comfortably!

For the record, I define comfort as a state where I don’t have to think twice before I buy the latest iPhone. I use the iPhone as a proxy to PPP or the Big Mac index.

So coming back, I know I make a lot of mistakes when I write. My grammar could do with improvement. I even slaughter a few sacred cows! I thus want to create a group of trusted friends, acquaintances that would read first drafts of what I write and give me feedback before I publish those on public platforms.

It will help me in two ways.
A, I will get advice from a trusted group of people.
B, It will help improve the quality of my output.

So, here are some more details on it.

Why you?
Because you have helped me in past. Because you have a view point that I thought was really unique. Because I believe you could help. And most importantly, because I thought you cared about how I write!

What kind of things will I send to you?
These would often be things that move me, things that I need an opinion on, things about technology, life, travel, writing, characters. Things that I really want to share.

And of course things I write for commercial purpose – books, scripts, speeches etc.

Think of this as a private blog or a closed mailing list. Think of this as way to peek into my brain. Think of this as a testing ground for me to test my ideas on. Think of yourselves as guinea pigs. And FYI, guinea pigs are actually rodents!

What do I expect from you?
Three things. Only.

Honest critique on what I send you. This could be comments, praises, edits, suggestions, ridicule, death threats, love letters, friendly fire etc.
Opportunities. If someone asks you for someone who could write, please point them to me.
Links, tips, things that I should be reading, videos that I should be watching, content I ought to be consuming, people I must talk to, practise that I need to put in, to become a better writer.

What is in it for you?
I dont know. Except the rush of good hormones that you get when you help someone. And my gratitude.

Think of yourself as a king. Or a queen. and think of me as an artesian who’s come to your court seeking your patronage and blessings. In the times when Kings and Queens ruled the world, they would often shower artesian with gold, pearls, palaces, princesses and what not.

On the other hand, all I am asking for is your time, your patronage. Too much to ask for?

That’s it!

Over to you guys!

Oh, this IS the first piece that I want your feedback on.

And, as Steve Jobs would’ve said…

one more thing… Who all do you think I can seek help from on writing? Can you please connect me with them so that I can include them in this list? I promise that I would not send more than one email a week.

On that note, if you choose to not receive these emails, PLEASE tell me and I would remove you from the list.

Thanks so much! Please do tell me how to improve this.

Regards,
Saurabh

P.S.: Once upon a time, I read this quote and I just cant get it out of my head. It goes… “If I have seen further it is by standing on the shoulders of giants.”

I have used it so often that I think I am bordering on getting obnoxious. But I love it so much that I cant stop using it. And I will continue to use it. So, dear giants, please help me see further.

Dear sgMS

Dear sgMS,

Its been some time that I’ve written into you. Today is as good a day as any to do so. And here I am. Actually, to be honest, today, I am missing you so so so much more than other days. I dont know why. I know I have promised in the past that I would try to move on. I tried to. You know it. But I cant. No, you are not to blame.

So I am going away for three weeks. I wont have access to email or phone and I wont know how to stalk you. Good thing is that I would be with someone who I can confide in. So may be I wont crave for you as much. But then may be I would. Yeah yeah I am an indecisive fuck. I dont know what I want and I dont know how to get it.

Once I am back, please grant me darshan. Its been some time that I’ve met you. No?

In the meanwhile, stay good. Stay happy.

Love,
SG

Dear Steve

Dear Steve,

Happy Birthday!

Wherever you are, I sincerely hope you happy. And I hope you are making that place better as well, the way you made Mother Earth better.

I know you did not know me. And I know you had no reason to even know of my existence. On the other hand Steve, I, Saurabh Garg, would have given an arm and a leg to know you. To make an acquaintance with you. Why would I do that? Because Steve you are one of your kind. You pushed everyone around you. They may or may not have realized but you made them better. At least I want to believe that you would have made them better.

If I have improved looking at you from a distance, if I have taken inspiration from you despite being separated by time and geography, if I try to evaluate things the way you would have evaluated, if I have started to set my standards higher, I am very sure that the ones that had the fortune of working closely with you would have grown by leaps and bounds. In fact there is this guy in Indian mythology who becomes the best archer of his time by practicing by himself in front of a mere statue of the greatest guru around. Purely by dedication, effort and perseverance. You Steve are that greatest guru that I ought to learn from. I know you are not around to take on disciples but Steve, even at this old age, I ought to learn from you. And I promise I would.

You know I am one of those countless super-fans that you still have across the world. And I am sure each of your fan is remembering you today. For, the world is infinitely better because of you. You ~~gave~~ showed us meaning of greatness. You gave us the inspiration for being the best we could be. And you gave us tools that allowed us to chase these dreams, even if they are frivolous.

Steve, you have been an inspiration. You will remain an inspiration.

You know, the biggest regret of my life is that I could not work with you. If there is after-life, may be, just may be I’d see you there.

Till then, thank you for everything.

Love,
SG

P.S.: I miss you.

Dear Shikhar Dhawan

Dear Shikhar Dhawan,

To start with, I love your batting. Really do. And I love your body language, your raw masculine appeal, and despite being a heterosexual male, your mustache. So much so that I wanted to grow mine to ape your style. Never before a physical trait of an individual has impressed me so much that I was willing to ape it. Your’s I was. But thanks to paucity of time, I could not.

I am grateful I could not.

You know why I am grateful? Because I am ashamed of you because of what you did on the field today and I dont want anything to do with you. Afterall they say a man is known by the company he keeps (or people he chooses to emulate).

Shikhar, I am also ashamed to have you as a part of the team that represents India, my country. A country where guests are greater than the God himself. A country where guests are welcomed with open arms and open hearts. What you did today was not something that a true Indian would do. If I could, I would throw you out of the country. And never let you back.

Shikhar, it was totally uncalled for. I understand that you are young and restless and emotions run wild while you are on the field. I know all the media frenzy and attention from young damsels can ruffle you. For a minute I am ready to even consider that they are masters of sledging and they could have instigated you in the first place. But Shikhar, we do not stoop down to their level. No sir, we do not. I guess while you were growing up, you did were not taught moral science. Which school did you go to again? I bet you skipped all the civics and moral science classes.

Someone may dismiss your actions as an immature act of a child while at play. But Shikhar you can no longer afford to be a child. You have a great responsibility on your shoulders. You represent India at the highest level of a game that everyone follows. Everytime you twirl that mustache of yours, millions of younger Indians take note. And your every action is like a fodder to young and impressionable brains of the next generation. I hate to see young Indians becoming ruder and irreverent while growing up. Shikhar, for a minute imagine your younger brother doing that you while you are playing a friendly match in your galli.

Anyway, despite claiming to be a writer, I am a man of few words. And most of my words are rants rather than fact based editorials. So anything I add henceforth in this letter would only be gibberish. Just that I want you to know that while the match was on, I frantically prayed that we, India, lost the match. And I sincerely hoped that the blame fell on your head. So that someone could put some sense into you. Someone has to. It sucks that people like you are free to roam around like loose canons.

And as a planner, someone who watches how the world is moving, I am really worried about the young India that we are creating. Being aggressive, brash is great. But being rude for no reason or without provocation is not. Even if we are instigated, there are other ways to settle the disputes. You know, we definitely need to aim for the stars but we must not forget our roots.

Shikhar, finally, thanks to you, the wonderful sport of cricket has lost yet another fan.

Regards,
An erstwhile cricket fan

P.S.: Dear Shane Watson, I apologize on Shikhar’s behalf.