So, the last night, I saw this film on Netflix. Called The Next Three Days, the film is a remake of a French film Anything For Her. No, I have not seen the original.
The film is a story of John, a community college professor whose wife, Lara is accused of a murder that she did not commit and is jailed for the rest of her life. The professor tries all legal, moral, ethical, by-the-law routes. And fails. The wife tries to commit suicide, something tips in the professor and plots an escape path for her. And while he does that, he ends up becoming what he never was – a criminal. Oh, and there is a young son, Luke that adds to the drama.
Without a doubt, The Next Three Days is among the best action-thriller-suspense films I’ve seen. There is not one thing that I would add or remove from the film. Even though the film is more than 2 hours long, I was hooked. One time I had to get up to pee and I did not want to. The writer and the director have done that great a job.
To plot the escape, the professor starts with research. He talks to a person that has escaped from jailed seven times, charts the escape route meticulously, sells whatever he can to raise the money, gets mugged while trying to acquire fake identities, to get his wife of the jail, he plans the escape plan meticulously, gets mugged, sells his belongings, gets a gun, gets embroiled with drug dealers and does things you and I would probably not.
The writing is tight. Not one character is out of place. Even though I have seen my share of crime and suspense films, there are so many times when you go, “oh faaaak” during the film. They had to actually dumb down things for the audience at multiple points in the narrative. I would not lie but I can recall a couple of places where if they did not tell us about the suspense, I would’ve missed it!
Apart from John and Lara, even the smallest character has been written well.
For example, there is this drug runner in the film that appears on the screen for like 30 seconds. Even though he is a bad guy and has three lines in the narrative, in those three lines you realize that he is not a bad guy and doing it merely because he grew up in a wrong neighborhood.
Then there is John’s brother’s wife. She’s apparently a pain in the backside in the first scene of the film. And when she reappears after an hour or so, she is still the same. And all she does is complain about coffee.
Liam Neeson comes for a brief bit and as expected does a Neesony job.
John’s parents play a parenty role – caring, reliable and all. As John is planning the escape, there is this nod, handshake and a hug between him and his father that tells that the two men haven’t had the most cordial relationship and they’ve buried the hatchet.
There are multiple cops in the film – the one that was investigating the murder charge on wife, the one that’s leading the investigation into the drug chase. Each is gritty, meticulous and working towards closure. They are great adversaries in the cat and mouse they play with John!
The characters have been made to work hard to get what they want. There are roadblocks and lucky breaks. As with life, hundred roadblocks and just a handful of lucky breaks. The cops have had to navigate politics, inefficiency, laziness, and ingenuity of John. John is like you and me – uses YouTube to learn how to break locks, get into cars, fake reports, etc. He practices, takes small risks at first, works harder, stumbles again and then gets lucky! You know, like a typical never-say-die dude? No wonder you feel for him and you root for him!
The lead characters – John and Lara – they are such a perfect couple that it is impossible (I guess this is the only problem I have with the film – couples can be that perfect!). They’ve been married for ages, have a kid and yet they are attracted to each other physically. When the wife is jailed, the husband visits her at every opportunity that he gets – he is the only one that believes in her innocence. When they know that she is not getting out, each other tries to console the other. The wife lies to nudge the husband to move on. The husband continues to paddle hope to his wife. Even when another woman makes a pass at John, he politely refuses the advances. When John finally manages to get the wife out of the reach of the cops, Lara being a moral, righteous citizen initially wants to conform to the cops and refuses to leave. She moves when John tries to tell her that they are at a point of no return and their son will be left alone if they do not run.
No, such couples do not exist. They are unreal.
As a family, with the kid, they are, again, unreal. They have so many of these familiar traditions – souvenirs, nicknames, photos, and whatnot. And they’ve shown those without exaggerating. Or without hyperbole. While watching the film, I was jealous that my family had none of those!
As an audience, there are so many points in the film where you find yourself rooting for the family. You laugh with them, cry with them and you share their despair. You get your hope up and then all of it comes crashing down. The film is as roller-coastery a ride as you’d imagine.
The action is fast – keeps you on the edge all the time. At each point, I was guessing what would he do next thing that’d happen. And more often than not, I was wrong. They have planted so many Red Herrings, so fast, that you would miss the subtlety if you are not paying attention to the film. And no, you can not, NOT pay attention. It is that good!
The background music could have been better. There is not one riff that I recall, a night after I saw the film. I do remember a scene where the car does a cartwheel – the background sound design at that moment does add to the drama. But apart from that, I cant seem to remember the music.
The film is a MUST WATCH.
Oh and the film raises some questions that no one film has made me think about. How far are you willing to go for your family? Where do you draw the line on conforming to society and authorities? What if the society is wrong and you know you are right, would you fight them off? And to what end? If everyone stood for their beliefs and started to use guns, will we not descend into anarchy? And how you do leave behind all that you have stood for and become a criminal? And where do you escape?
In one line, how do you become an anti-hero? Well, he wasn’t an anti-hero at all – he never felt like a bad man. Ever. I mean, I’ve seen my share of “family-first” films and dramas. From Prison Break to Godfather to Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gam to more. While each of these is a masterpiece of cinema, they did not make me question myself about the extent to which I’d go for my family.
Those stories are distant. They looked like the ones that would happen to someone else. Not to me. The Next Three Days could have easily been my story. One of my family members could get framed for a crime that he did not commit and even when evidence is stacked tall against him, will I continue to be on this side? Will I sell whatever I have? Will I leave my life behind? Would I pick a gun?
Today was my Day 1 at a WeWork. Prior to this I sat out of Red Bricks Offices (RB) for almost 2 years. Here’s what I noticed on my first day.
A cool place to work out of!
As advertised, Wework is definitely cooler. Everything is premium AND international. From the decor to space to ambience to the way staff is dressed. I’ve been to almost all major co-working spaces in India and WeWork hands-down is THE best! And probably THE most expensive.
Co-workers
Most people at this office are “employees” and not entrepreneurs. I am not sure how do their employers afford! That aside, I had thought that WeWork would attract entrepreneurs, solopreneurs, artists and other creative kinds. But I am not sure how many of those are here!
Also because a lot of these are employees, for them work is a way to while time while they are paid. There is no energy around. They spend more time in gossip and “chilling” compared to working. Of course I have nothing against chilling but a place where everyone is on a mission is buzzing with lot more activity! You know what am saying?
I dont want “comfortable” people around. I want the ones that are on a mission to change the world! Think Elon’s of the world.
I would’ve loved to see more interesting people. Or may be its me who’s not interesting enough ;P
Quality of work
As I write this, its 9 PM and I have been here since 11 AM. And for some reason I have been able to focus better than what I could at RB.
I cant say I got done a lot but I could definitely stay at a particular for a longer time.
Maybe because I dont know anyone here and thus I am not gossiping?
I think it has something to do with the way the place has been designed. From comfortable chairs to spacious desks to high ceiling, things here are designed to help you work.
Also, at this hour work is a tad better. Probably because the only ones here are the ones that actually want to get some work done! The ones that were chilling have TV serials to catch up on ;P
Oh, its tough to take phone calls at this place. People and the place is way too loud.
Food
If I plan to work from here, I need to plan my meals.
Since 11, I have just had processed food – coffee, coke (regular, not Diet, not Zero), biscuits, chips and all that. For one day its cool. But I cant be doing this everyday. Especially when I hope to get fitter and climb the Everest and all that.
In fact this could actually work in my favour. I could get a keto dabba and that could enable me to lose weight and get fitter! Need to think.
Headphones
Because of the kind of people I have around here, I will have to invest into some headphones. The Airpods offer me a limited noise cancellation.
I did it.
The unthinkable.
The worst thing that I could ever do as a moviegoer.
I saw Veere Di Wedding (IMDB)!
Yeah, the same movie that has driven a wedge between the otherwise stable relationships of all the men and women that were living in peace and harmony. There are men dismissing the movie as a chick-flick. There are women defending the content. Then there are men siding with the film and there are women who are saying that modern girls around their 30s are not like how they’ve been portrayed.
Its a fascinating battle brewing and I would love to take a side but then I am not as educated or informed as the twitterati. Oh, my universe is limited to twitter only.
Why would I commit an atrocity of this magnitude on myself?
Well. Lesser said about it, the better. Now that its been done, it’s time to write a review. After I got some 300 odd hits on my review for Bhavesh Joshi, I have this career as a film-reviewer and I ought to stay with it.
So, the logline is, a group of four girl friends, each with a dysfunctional family, tries to come to terms with their respective issues as they come together for the wedding of one of the girls from the group. Neat. Sounds like fun. Similar to Dil Chahata Hai – a story of three friends trying to grow up as they make a trip to Goa.
Still from Veere Di Wedding
Like in DCH, there are these friends, there is banter and leg pulling and pranks. There is travel, there is music, there is emotions and there is a lot more jazz. No, not music but things that make movies, movies. But you know, this is where similarities end!
I’ll come back to it.
PS: If Farhan Sir is reading this, please excuse me. For I have sinned by comparing your masterpiece with this!
So, the friend I saw the film with, she said the film is inspired by the famous sitcom, Sex And The City. No, I haven’t seen the sitcom. But I am told that the even though it has a million episodes or something, sitcom stays true to the theme (of 4 middle-aged women trying to cope with relationships in a big, fast-paced city). Each has a set of relationship issues that needs sorting and the friends are the support system, the coping mechanism, the bouncing board and all that.
In VDW, while the inspiration is striking, the “episode” is just about 2 hours long, it veers all over the place. The characters are flat, the friendship bland and there is no support or coping or bouncing happening. Flat as in wine that’s been left in the open for too long. Bland as in cheese that’s been given too much air.
Coming back to DCH, the relationships (both between the set of friends and with others) were really deep. You could experience their elation, anguish, anger, happiness and all those things. In each scene. In each dialogue. In VDW, you cant remember if they were laughing in the previous scene or if they were crying. May be a gang of girls is like that? On a perpetual rollercoaster ride. I am not sure. At least the ones I hung out with were, are not like that.
In DCH, when the guys argue and fight and all that, you feel their anger and the pain. You can understand their actions. You know the dude has fucked up and you take sides. In VDW, the conflict, whatever little of it has been portrayed, is so weak that you don’t realize that it was the peak and the characters need to resolve it to take the story to the ending! Mr. Campbell must’ve turned in his grave. Of course not every story has to conform to his monomyth structure.
You know of those movies? Coming of age? Bildungsroman? May be VDW is an attempt in that direction? If it is, they ought to have spoken to Abhishek Kapoor. The guy, I think, has got coming of age right in India. You know of his repertoire?
Anyhow. The movie, ladies and gentleman is so ordinary that you can easily skip it!
If I were working on the project, what would I improve?
A lot!
A. The story to start with. Actually come to think of it, the story was ok, you could tweak it a bit. But screenplay needed a lot of work. It just couldn’t keep me interested. Despite all the gorgeous places that films has been shot at, all the color that is splashed around by the sets, all the banter between friends, all the mockery that they’ve made of the loud South Delhi culture, the film couldn’t keep my interest.
B. I’d definitely improve the on-screen camaraderie between these friends. I mean I’ve never been part of these pajama parties, as they call em, but I am sure they are lot more fun. The banter is forced. The dialogues are predictable. The lines are cliched. Apart from a bracelet with their initials and a painting by mothers of one of the friends, they don’t seem to have anything that identifies them as part of a clique. The screenplay should’ve established their friendship better and stronger.
C. The conflict, when it all was supposed to fall apart, when the friends fight, when they call names and all that, is so weak and so short-lived that you don’t even realize that it had happened. Compare it with DCH. There is a big-ass argument and a fight and it takes Herculean effort to fix! Here, in VDW, all it took was a holiday? A phone call? Come on!
D. There are some really bad product placements. When If you see the film, you will notice that there are scenes that have blatant and liberal placement for brands like Uber, Bikaji, Air India and others. And these are done so bad that you think you are in a 2-hour long advertisement. Someone needs to bring back the love and passion in the business of making films.
Lemme talk of each of the Veeres, as they call themselves.
The one with the cigarette.
I don’t know why one of the characters always had a cigarette around. In the loo, in the car, on the beach, on the bed, in the wedding. Ok, I know you want to establish her as a free-spirited woman (did you?), could you not find a better instrument than a cigarette? Or those Calvin Klein sports bras?
The bride.
Ok, you are scared of this whole thing called marriage. I understand. I actually think that her character was written well! I don’t have any complaints. But then, I also don’t really have any vivid memories of her after I’ve seen the movie. She is ordinary. You know how you have this salt-shaker on the dining table that no-one notices unless they need em? That!
The lawyer.
Sigh. Lesser said the better.
If you can’t seem to endure this blogpost, please skip to the bottom and do read the open letter that I’ve written to her.
The married one.
She is actually the best of the lot. Played her part well. Had better one-liners to deliver compared to others. I wish she had a meatier role. She could’ve held the story together. But then shes not a Kapoor you know. Or may be I am wrong. The point however remains that her character had hope and they fucked it up.
The good parts?
There are a few two. No, seriously. There are. Here’ a list.
A. There is this character called Bhandari.
He comes in rather late but when he does, he is probably what makes the film tolerable. He may sound crass, down-market, a letch or whatever but he is what he is. He’s done a great job – the kinds that would’ve taken a lot of effort to pull off. I want to see more of him. I actually miss him. He doesn’t have a lot of dialogues or scenes but every-time he comes up, you do take notice. He’s like that subtle flavour, seasoning in a complex dish that you cant put your finger on. But you know that the dish has the distinctive taste because of that one flavour. You know? The magic sauce? That!
B. I loved the cinematography!
The locations are breathtaking. The movie looks gorgeous. Of course the 4 ladies are pretty and all that but even if I removed them from the shots, the empty frames would look great! Its, as more established critics will say, is
So, the verdict?
Don’t go to a movie hall to see it.
Once its on Netflix, you may want to spend an evening fast-forwarding your way through it.
I’d give Veere Di Wedding a 1 star.
Also, I must say that I saw the film on a Tuesday night and the hall was almost half-full. Which is a lot considering its been a few days since the film came out. So maybe, there’s something there.
And while you are at it, you may want to see this review by this lady.
Oh, if despite the warning, you do decide to watch this, all the best!
Do let me know what you think.
I am @saurabh on twitter.
Thanks for reading!
SG
PS.: As I end this, there are two things that I want to talk about.
A, Please know that as a critic and a reviewer, I do not want to merely diss the creators. My intent of being a critic is not to discourage the ones that do the new. But to learn from them. And when its my turn to create, not repeat the mistakes. I subscribe to Anton Ego says about critics.
And B. As someone who’s had a crush on Sonam Kapoor K Ahuja since I was a child (when I first saw her in Pyar Ki Ganga Bahe), may I please write an open letter to her? Here goes…
Dear Sonam,
I really really love your sense of style. Plus I am a big fan of your smile. It is second only to Julia Roberts’ . The way you carry and conduct yourself? It is so unique that you’re one of your kind. Anyone would want to give their arm and leg to see you smile. I will.
But…
But could you PLEASE stop acting?
I mean take inspiration from your sister – Rhea. She is a producer. And she has chosen to remain that. What if you remain a mere socialite? and actually up the ante at those parties and charities and fashion events? Really! As a marketer, I really think that’s a greater opportunity for you. For every crappy film that you do, you reduce the brand value and you takeaway reasons from brands like Loreal et al to pull the plug. There is a limit to which that these brands can support you. No?
Oh, btw, even if you decide to continue working in films as an actor, of course as someone who loves you, I will continue to support you. All the best!
So yesterday, I saw Bhavesh Joshi. And this is the review.
I first heard about the movie was when I saw the trailer at one of the other movies that I saw a few weeks ago. Yeah, am watching a lot more movies.
Anyhow. So I saw the trailer and I knew I had to go see Bhavesh. And then I forgot about it. Till I met a friend who writes films (one feature under his belt, second underway) and he told me how Phantom is struggling with Bhavesh Joshi and its been stuck for 4 years and so on and so forth. No, I don’t know any more gossip and all that but they were struggling for sure.
So when yesterday a friend and I were deciding to go see VDW, somehow we realized that Bhavesh is also releasing the same day. And I tricked her into booking Bhavesh. Yay!
Yay for having avoided VSW VDW (the movie is apparently so bad that I even got the name wrong) which going by this review is a super decision (the review has since been deleted – I suspect the SM team from the VDW reached out to the lady ;P). But a big yay and a #selfPatOnBack.
But then, the yay was short-lived.
It lasted till the interval during Bhavesh – that’s when the movie starts going downhill. Like Jokersays, everyone is on the edge and all they need is a push. Bhavesh was teetering on the edge and dint even need the push. It just needed a whiff of air. And there was a fucking hailstorm blowing in Bhavesh’s face. A hailstorm made of poor story, lacklustre plot, ordinary acting and other pieces of mediocrity that you don’t typically expect from Phantom. I guess everyone has their ups and downs!
What the F! Its an Anurag Kashyap Vikramaditya Motwane film for fuck sake!
Wait. Stay with me. I’ll come back to it.
For the time being, here’s a one-line summary of the film, or the logline, as they call it in the industry. Bhavesh Joshi is a common-man turned vigilante that takes on the might of the politician-businessmen nexus hellbent on fucking with the city to make money.
I were a film producer and this logline was narrated to me, the first reaction would have been, “what a awe-fuckin-some idea!“. And then I would be shrouded in a heady mix of fear, awe and excitement.
Fear – has something like this ever been attempted in India?
No, not Krissh. It’s lame at another level that doesn’t even merit another word on this blog. Or on the whole of Internet. Not even in the history books that are often written at the behest of celebrities. Wait Mr. Garg. This is not about Krissh.
Can I make a film that is so simple and yet so complex? Am I evolved enough to handle? I would be afraid. Really.
Awe – what all can I do with it?
To the film maker in me, the logline makes me gasp at the tremendous opportunities that I can explore with the plot. I’d be awed by the shades of characters that I can create. It inspires awe by allowing me to explore dark themes that most other movies don’t allow me to.
Excitement – can I bring it alive?
Fear and bravado often gives way to daring. And that is where excitement is. Remember that excitement that Red talks about? In case you’ve lived under a rock, he says, “I find Iām so excited, I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head. I think it the excitement only a free man can feel, a free man at the start of a long journey whose conclusion is uncertain.”
I feel a similar excitement when I think about this logline, this plot! Can’t you feel it? The fear, the awe, the excitement?
Oh, and once these emotions have gone past me, I would let go of the opportunity to make this film. Really. Why? Because I wont have the balls to produce it!
No really. I wont. Its a very risky idea. Unless I have a lot of money that I can throw around, lose and not lose my sleep over it. Its not even a venture where I see a potential of a 10x return!
But if all producers were like me, no ambitious projects will ever get made! I love people like Phantom for exactly the same reason. Truth be told, the only reason I saw this was because only a Phantom could’ve dared to make a movie like this. Or may be Drishyam. These are the only two sets of people that try new things. Or like Apple said in one of their ads, “push the human race forward!”
Where I said no, they decided to back this up. They found the money. And the balls. And they jumped in.
And I thank them for that. For unless I had seen what Bhavesh is, I wouldn’t know what Bhavesh could be. As a writer, there are a million lessons in what not to do while working on a film (more on this later).
So, after all that ado for nothing, the movie, in one word is disappointing!
There is so so so (repetition on purpose) much potential in the movie that it could’ve been a legit competition to the likes of Batman. Just that it fails to go anywhere. Lemme make a list.
A. For starters, the movies lacks a credible and powerful villain.
Thing with Superheroes is that while they are awesome and do great things and all that, they need a villain (or an anti-hero) to be able to showcase their might, their strength and even their vulnerability.
I mean can you imagine a Batman without a Joker? Or a Sherlock for that matter without a Moriarty? There is no one that makes Bhavesh Joshi what he eventually becomes. Agree that he fights against a system, a set of people and all that. But is he up against a league A villain? No!
There is no challenge. There is just systematic pressure. There is no personality, no individual, no anti-hero that makes Bhavesh get out from the bed. I mean why does Bhavesh exist? He wants to do good. Ok. Who doesn’t? Ramu Kaka, the security guard from my building wants to do good and is willing to risk whatever when he feels that he’s been wronged!
B.Characters are not memorable.
There are times that you feel for the characters and their respective losses but the characters are not memorable at all. I saw the movie last night and even though its not been 24 hours since, I cant seem to remember one great thing that any of the characters said. Or did. Or stood for.
Ok I agree that Bhavesh stood for something but then is that what I want to take away from a Superhero movie? No way man! Remember my Ramu Kaka? Bhavesh. That!
C. Too long.
The movie has at least 3 long scenes that do not add one bit to the story. I mean they were shot in typical Tarantino-meets-Slumdog cinematic style and had one or two fine moments. But…
But did they add to the story? No.
But did they establish Bhavesh? No.
But did they help make the villain more villainous? No.
No.
No and no.
And more no.
Why did they put those shots? To make it dark? To give me that adrenaline rush? To ensure that the movie is 2 and half hours long? Come on!
D. The post-interval snafu.
The movie was a great watch till the time interval happened.
From the very beginning, the story progresses at a snail’s pace but since they were still building the narrative, it was ok. I could understand. But once the conflict had reached the high point and I was hoping for a masterful resolution, the nudge from that edge, those winds start blowing. The movie, like I said already, goes downhill. So downhill that I am beginning to question the genius of Anurag Kashyap Motwane.
That’s about it from me.
Oh, the music by Amit Trivedi – Amitabh Bhattacharya duo is great as always. The background score could’ve been far better. The acting is ok – like I said, no character stands out. There aren’t any moments that you retain after you’ve watched the movie. You don’t even feel sorry for their loss. And neither do you feel any elation for their victory.
Bhavesh Joshi may be a Superhero that we need (in the Indian cinema) but we definitely deserve someone better than Bhavesh. Oh, I’d like to create one. Anyone wants to collaborate? I am @saurabh on twitter.
To end this longish review, I’d give Bhavesh Joshi 2 stars out of 5.
But please do see the film. Its brave. Its an interesting story that you often don’t get to see coming out of India. And the movie makes me hopeful that cinema in India will continue to do well. Oh, and Thank You Anurag, Vikramaditya and others for Bhavesh Joshi. I will want to see more from you. And hopefully, soon.
On more thing. Of course I remain a mere critic and like I do in most reviews that I do, lemme quote Anton here. He says, “In many ways, the work of a critic is easy. We risk very little, yet enjoy a position over those who offer up their work and their selves to our judgment. We thrive on negative criticism, which is fun to write and to read. But the bitter truth we critics must face is that, in the grand scheme of things, the average piece of junk is probably more meaningful than our criticism designating it so. But there are times when a critic truly risks something, and that is in the discovery and defense of the new. The world is often unkind to new talent, new creations. The new needs friends…”
Over and out.
Saurabh Garg
2 Jun 2018
PS: If I were to work on the plot, I would make following changes to the script.
1. Add more shades of dark to the villains. I’d actually create an anti-hero that the audience roots for. Something that divides the audience on their opinion. You know Joker? Whatever he says, speaks or does is rational and logical. Remember Thanos from the recent Avengers? You actually want the villain to win. You fight with your friends and you are not sure what is good and what is bad. You want to get aligned to their “cause.” Bhavesh needs a cause. A thing that an aam-aadmi wants to get attached to.
2. I wont Indianise the script or the plot. I will not put a love angle when its not required. There is that mandatory girlfriend. Why? Why do we need her? Why does Bhavesh need her?
3. I will make the script credible. You are telling me that the person could sit in the airport and hack the immigration system? You tell me that you could be on a run for a few weeks and you could still eat a vada-pao without looking over your shoulders? You don’t leave fingerprints all over the world and while the the cop knows when to call the immigration system, he doesn’t know when to summon the forensics experts?
Oh and the alternate ending? I have it written. Just that I don’t want to publish is here and spoil the film. Write to me (@saurabh on twitter) and I will mail you back.
P.P.S.: I made this mindmap while I was writing the review. In case you want to see, its available for free for you to download. You’d need www.xmind.net (free) to see / edit it. Do tell me if you find this useful.
It’s a very simple and yet fascinating story. A place crashes in the mountains. Everyone aboard dies. A three-month old baby is found next to the wreck. Two families, one super rich and other of limited means, claim ownership of the baby. They get into a fierce battle that lasts for 18 years, till the baby is an adult.
No points for guessing the side where the scale would tilt. And yet it takes them 18 years to discover the truth.
And when the truth comes out, more than who won or who lost, I, the reader, was disappointed! More on this as we go along.
So the book starts with the plane crash and a detective who is about to commit suicide. This detective has been hired by the richer family to establish the true identity of the baby. The detective wants to kill himself because despite his earnest attempts he hasn’t been able to crack the case. But just before he is to pull the trigger on the gun placed on his temple, he stumbles onto something and establishes the real identity of the baby and thus solves the case.
All the while he was investigating, he has maintained meticulous records and observations of his hunt for the identity of the baby. And over the course of his investigation he has come close to the miracle baby (as she is called in the book) and the family that gets the custody of the baby (I am not saying which one).
The narrative shuttles you between present and past, weaving all that has happened over the years in a tight story. It has been done so well that you as a reader is never lost and you actually start craving for the bouncing around in the timeline. (Side note: I actually thought that I could rewrite #tnks with the same narrative style!)
Apart from that the book has a lot of false starts, red herrings, clues that lead to dead ends. In that sense, the book keeps you engaged. There are clues strewn all over the narrative. And yes it is hard to put the book down. It does drag for a bit here and there but that’s ok. And no it is no Stieg Larsson.
For me, when I read a book that promises a mystery, I want to have all the clues in front of me. I want to put on my Sherlock hat and try and decode the clues myself. I want to race ahead of the narrator and discover the truth. I want the gratification of being proved right. Or wrong. With After The Crash, I was not given the opportunity. I was told that the clue is in front of my eyes but it was never revealed to me. It was hidden from me till the very end. I thus felt cheated as a reader. As an amateur detective. But then that’s the author’s choice. Not the reader’s and I respect Michel’s!
So while I thoroughly liked reading the book, I did not like how the entire mystery came together towards the end. The last quarter of the book could be have been far well written. The mystery could’ve been little more twisted. The reader could’ve been given little more credit.
Having said that, its a great one-time read. And no, you will not read the book second or third time to enjoy the descriptions or dialogues or scenes or narratives. Overall, a 3-star rating from me.
P.S.: Thanks to @Vivek for sending a review copy. As with other review copies, this one is up for taking. If you are in Mumbai and can pick it up at your expense, please let me know and I will be happy to give this away.
And no, I was not paid to read the book or write the review. I did on my own accord.
Wrote this a few days ago. Couldn’t publish in time. But der aaye, durust aaye!
Dear Mary Kom,
I just came back from a movie hall after watching the eponymous biopic based on your life. And it was moving. So moving that it has made me write this letter. The letter is going to be a really long one. Please do get a bucket of popcorn and some soda before you start reading this.
First things first. You are a wonderful wonderful person Mary. You are a true achiever and a true fighter. I love your never-say-die attitude. I love the way you are totally committed to your sport. I love the way you have been an exemplary ambassador for the sport of boxing. Thank you so much for bringing so much glory to India. I am so proud that you and I are compatriots. I sincerely wish I could do half the things that you’ve done. You deserve all the awards and medals and appreciation and flowers and other things that we have bestowed upon you. And I sincerely believe that you deserve a lot more. Apologies that it took a movie to get me (and probably other Indians) to notice your contribution to our country.
So, if this letter gets rude, out of place, please ignore it as a rant of a jobless old man.
I do not mean any disrespect to you, but Mary, you’ve made a mistake. A big big mistake. You allowed Sanjay Leela Bhansali and Omung Kumar (I loved Omung Kumar when I was a kid when he did shows like Ek Minute etc.) to make the movie on your life. And you allowed Priyanka Chopra (who I know has been put on earth to marry me someday) to play the lead. The three of them, individually, are great (like I said). Probably as accomplished as you are. But the three of them together created a mess that is hard to digest. There are so many things wrong with the movie that I don’t even know where to start.
Actually I know where to start. Research. If I were to make a sporting movie and a boxing movie at that, I would have done a LOT of research on it. No no, not on your life. That would be easy because I would merely need to sit with you and get dope on you (which I hope they did!) But research on sporting movies per se. I would want to know what kind of sporting movies have worked in the past. What are the few things that make a sports movie interesting. After all, its not a typical rom-com where the actors are running around trees and stealing pecks when no one’s watching. I would’ve seen the classics like Angels in the Outfield, Finding Buck McHenry, even Mighty Ducks etc etc. And I would have seen the boxing movies like the Rocky series, Million Dollar Baby, Ali etc. I would even see Jerry Mcguire. And movies from India that have done well – Chak De India, Bhaag Milkha Bhaag etc.
And then, once I have done all this research, seen all these movies, I would goto the drawing board and start working on your movie. From what it seemed to me, the research bit was missing from your movie. Leave aside research, the script did not have the essential ingredients for a sports film. What could those ingredients be? I think it would be a long list but the key ones would be fast-paced story, action-packed fighting scenes, grandeur and strong characters (apart from you Mary) that inspire.
Mary, you are an accomplished boxer. Couldn’t you consult the director on the boxing scenes atleast? The fight sequences were really really bad. They were so boring that I could’ve actually shown a clock ticking on the screen. I would’ve saved some money. Even the training bits were really sad. Look at Bhaag Milkha Bhaag. For whatever that movie was worth, it got the training bit correct. You can see the dude sweating while he was training. In your case, agreed you woke up early and you milked the cow and all that but that’s your training? Really?
So anyhow let me talk about these characters. Lets start with your coach. Of course the coach is like the Guru. Whatever he says, is like a thing cast in stone. He has to be inspiring. Look at Micky. He made Rocky the fighter he was. Look at SRK in Chak De. Leave boxing and hockey. Look at a simple movie like Rockford. Nagesh Kukunoor is a PT teacher to kids and he is inspiring. Mary, your coach, to me did not look like someone who could inspire. Please please know that I am talking from the perspective of the movie. The actor, the lines, the action, demeanor of the coach is so so important for a sporting movie that you had to have a brilliant actor play that role. I don’t understand why would you settle for someone who has not proven his mettle as an actor!
Then, your husband. Damn I hate him. He is too too good to be true. You cant imagine the plight of all other men in the country. When a woman sees your husband do all those sweet things for you, they’d start expecting their men to do the same. Thank God the movie flopped. Otherwise your husband would have been the reason for a few divorces for sure.
Lets talk about your father. His anger and exasperation is justified. He is a simple man and wants his daughter to do well. But Mary, in the movie, did you actually give approval to overt dramatization to that fight scene that is apparently shot in Turkey? Where you are down and out and your father sees you take a thrashing of your life and he then yells at a television to encourage you. And you, some 6000 KMs away get this burst of energy that helps you win. Mary, are you telling me (the gullible movie-goer) that telepathy works? I mean, it may. But this much dramatization? Are you sure? And no, it did not happen at just one place. Even the fight in the climax when your son is struggling with life and your come back. Really?
Then Mary, where did the entire thing about “you being discriminated in a bout because you are a Manipuri” come in from? Do you really think so? You really think we are that small? Some of us may be. But Indians at large? I was actually offended at that scene. Filmmakers have a responsibility and it sucks that someone would resort to communal tensions to make a story out of an incident. And please know that you are as Indian as I am. In fact, Mary, you are a notch better. Way better actually. Because you’ve brought glory to the country. I on the other hand have just ranted on this blog. Did you not realize that the management or the federation declared the other girl a winner because they hated your guts. Not because you are a Manipuri. Please Mary. I sincerely hope that you did not approve of that bit in the film.
There are so many more questions I have. But I guess time is not on my side. Over all, I think its a poorly written film. The direction and acting looked half-hearted as well. The fight scenes were pathetic. A film-student could have done a better job in my humble opinion.
Oh, and the film lacked grandeur. As an amateur film maker, it seemed to me that you guys cut corners while making the film. The sets were done poorly, space was sparse and props lacked detail, something that I did not expect from a team of Bhansali and Omung Kumar who have worked on magnum opuses like Black and Saawariya. I mean look at all other Sanjay Leela Bhansali films. The only thing that stands out in those films is the opulence, the grandness, the larger than life visual hooks. Your movie Mary, lacked all of it.
Some parts looked as if they were shot on a phone camera. May be they were indeed shot with a small camera. After all, cinematic creativity is something that I dont know nothing about as yet. You should’ve seen the sketches and you should’ve been a part of the PPM and other such meetings.
In the end, Mary, I think you ought to give your story to some other filmmaker who would probably do justice to your story and tell is better. You need to redeem yourself. The next generations just can not have this movie as the reference point when they think about the boxing legend from India – Mary Kom!
Regards,
An Indian who is very proud of your achievements. And is disappointed with the film.
What could’ve been better?
Story, script and screenplay
Actors
Design
What worked for me?
Your husband. Even the actor and his acting.
Before I launch in a full-blown review, let me get some numbers out of the way. I mean the ratings.
Readability: 3.5 on 5 Suspense: 2 on 5 (I could guess the killer moment the character was first introduced) Storyline / Plot: 4 on 5 Overall: 3.5 on 5
One line verdict: A good one-time read. However the story, the characters, the plots won’t really stay with you after you’ve read the book.
Full Review
Before the review, lets try to make a recipe for a bestseller in the crime / thriller category.
Step 1. Take one potion underdog hero who is battling with his personal demons and alcohol (or drug) addiction.
Step 2. Throw in a bunch of loyalists who would stand by the hero through the thick or thin.
Step 3. Add atleast two people who think that the hero is a bag full of shit and is better cornered into a remand home or something.
Step 4. Finally, create a villain who has a personal vendetta against someone really really famous. Step 5. And then let the villain plan, plot, execute, run from the hero, to eventually get caught by the hero, only to turn tables in the climax, before tables turn one more time to give the hero the upper edge.
Step 6. Of course, once the dish is ready, as per the taste, sprinkle some steamy scenes, sidekicks (for the hero, the heroine and the villain) and personal histories of all characters.
Private India follows this recipe down to a T. Except the steamy love scenes. Wonder why did they leave it out.
Anyhow, coming to the story, the lovely city of Mumbai is rocked by a series of murders. Each victim is a famous personality with a vague connection to the Bollywood. On each crime site, a series of clues is left alongside each victim and its upto our righteous, know-it-all Private Detective to solve the mystery of the clues. And prevent the serial killer from going on a spree. And ofcourse catch the killer.
There are a couple of side plots as well. Purely to distract us, the readers, from the main story. And to give the book a larger theme per se. But I’d say, the side plot is so weak that they could’ve totally left it out.
So, while the unknown assailant is merrily killing people, the hero is trying to catch up with the killer and the side-plot is trying to confuse us, lessons in history happen and we suddenly reach the end of the story! That ways, the story flows smooth. Very smooth. I wish I could write like that.
Coming to the good bits.
Each chapter is less than 1000 words. Some are even less than 500. So it makes for a very very easy read.
The story has been penned really nicely. Its very readable. Clearly the book has been written for people who probably are new readers.
One of those fast, pacy reads where story doesn’t drag at all. The kinds that you can read in one sitting if you are on a beach or on a holiday.
And the not-so-good bits
Despite both of them being very very popular authors, this is the first James Patterson or Ashwin Sanghi that I am reading. And honestly, I expected better. From whatever I have heard, Ashwin Sanghi’s strength is digging up history (or mythology etc) and coming up with interesting takes and twists on those. At least my friends have made me believe so. Private India is nothing like that.
And James Patterson is like the grand-daddy of writing (and thrillers) and each his book is expected to be a page-turner and unputdownable. As a struggling author, its one of my dreams to be able to write as well as him. This one, however, is not really up there.
May be its a case of over-promise and under-delivery?
In the end
Like I said, its a good one-time read. Perfect for a holiday or a vacation. Reading Private India is like watching one of those mindless action flicks where you sit through the film and you enjoy the violence, without applying your brain. And when the movie over, even though you don’t recall what or why, but you know that you had a good time watching it.
P.P.S.: This is the first time I am doing a post as a part of some review program. I would tag all subsequent review posts as #aff. And no, I don’t make any money from these reviews / posts.
P.P.P.S.: My book is coming out in Oct. If you like reading and you would want to review my book, please leave your details in this form.
Thank you. Thank you for being rude to my friends and me. Thank you for telling us to leave your store unless we ordered “once every hour”. Thank you for breaking all faith, all trust that you had earned over the years.
I know that you are in the business of selling (often overpriced) beverages and (often bad quality) food to (often) unsuspecting patrons like myself. No, I dont blame you. You are not alone. There are multiple businesses offering exact same thing. In fact one of them is headed towards an IPO! After all the incomes are rising, people have money to spend and we Indians love to go out. I also know that the business requires people to spend long hours and order these beverages and keep the cash register ringing. I also know that there are people like me who sit at your air-conditioned cafes for long hours and keep other patrons customers away.
But then, if the entire cafe was empty and were not preventing any other customers from occupying those empty places. We were not loud. We were not rude. We were not out of place. We merely wanted to sit for sometime to make a presentation that we could take to an investor and raise money for our business. If we could sit, finish the deck and got the money, you could have been part of our story. Just like Starbucks is a part of my first book. Dear Gloria Jeans, you lost the opportunity. In fact, if I dont get the required money from the prospective investor, like a sore loser, I could blame you. No?
You know, I am not really out of place. Between the three of my friends we had ordered food and beverages worth 1200 bucks. Despite that, is it right for you to ask us to “order something once every hour?” May be it is. The place where I come from, we often say, “atithi devo bhava,” the guest is like a God. May be you guys are different.
To be honest, your barista was really courteous during the entire episode. When we asked him why, he told us that “he is questioned” if we sat “idle” and “without a drink” in front of us. Company policy. Sigh! You know Gloria Jeans dear, more businesses have had to shut shop because of these company policies than any other reason.
Of course its your premises and you have the right to refuse admission. But did you refuse admission? No. Did you refuse to serve me? No. Did you throw me out once I gave you money? Yes! At least thats how I felt. And no, I am not exaggerating. And I am not the kinds to crib and rant about businesses unless something really ticks me off. You have ticked me off.
You know, I may not be a celebrity and I definitely don’t have access to television and other such large mediums. And one irate customer cant really do much. Too small and too insignificant. But I can ensure that I never spend any money at any of your outlets anymore. And I can urge all my friends to not visit a Gloria Jeans. Not in Mumbai. Not in India. Not anywhere in the world.
I know, I am too small, too insignificant in the large scheme of things. But then, like Pink Floyd says, we’re all just another brick in the ball.
No?
Anyhow, all the best for your future endeavors. To me it looks bleak. But I have been wrong in the past. I sincerely hope this time I am not.
Regards,
A regular patron who will not spend any money at any of your stores anytime soon.
The other day I was trying to find a touch screen phone for my dad and I did not want to spend a lot of money. So rather than going to Flipkart and doing a random search for phones, I thought I would use FindYogi.com (a friend is a co-founder. Please see disclaimer at the end of the post).
Last few years, online shopping has proliferated like mushrooms and its time that some kind of filtering system came up that helped users sift through so many online destinations, each destination claiming to be cheaper and better than the other. FindYogi is one such “decision engine” that aggregates prices and data from multiple online shops. More than mere aggregation, it also enables the users to make an informed choice – both on the what to buy and where to buy from.
Since I had to buy a phone anyway, I gave FindYogi a spin. I started by browsing through the home page and looking at “popular products”. I am assuming that this list of popular products is generated by amount of search traffic that each product gets.
FindYogi.com homepage
So I clicked on iPhone and was taken to a page that had detailed specs (albeit too detailed for someone non-technical like me). Apart from details, FindYogi showed a long list of stores where I could buy it online and I could go directly to seller. And the stores were listed in an increasing order of price. Sweet.
Next thing I tried was the comparison feature. I went back to the home page and selected three phones that I am vaguely aware of. Nexus, Canvas and iPhone and added them to the comparison basket. And then I did the side by side comparison. Few things immediately caught my eye.
FindYogi highlights the best feature amongst the three phones that I compared and I was in for a surprise (I did not know that iPhone is dual core and Micromax Canvas is quad core – whatever that means, but I did not know that iPhone was inferior to other two). Coming back, FindYogi also throws a result by recommending a phone, as evaluated purely on features (everything else like Brand, emotions etc withstanding).
Comparing three phones on FindYogi
While doing my comparison, two things that helped me
shortlist (and reinforce my belief in the decision) were the Yogi Index
and Feature Score. They are simple ideas really but can make life so
much simpler for users.
Over time, if I was FindYogi founder, I would
try and make these ratings impeccable and try and get these ratings out
to the market. I would love if users would say, “this phone has a
FindYogi index of 4.1, just buy without any questions”. More on this in
the good things bit.
All in all a good and intuitive comparison engine. Separating “brand” from “product” does not come naturally to us humans. And engines like FindYogi help up over come those biases. And, yes I do hate the fact iPhone is not the best phone out there.
The top result was a phone by Acer called BeTouch. And other results were phones that had the word touch in their name. Though its a good idea for a search engine to find items from the catalog that has the words “touch” but I ideally wanted FindYogi.com to identify “touch” as a feature on mobile phones and give me an option to show only those phones that have that feature. Of course in the database, FindYogi does have a classification like that, scroll down and there you have options like touch, numeric etc, but I want to see it used better. This “feature” search needs improvement.
Also on the search results page, I could use the slider on the price range and multiple selection to make a shortlist of phones available to me. But then this shortlist was limited to phones matching to the keyword “touch” that I had initially used.
Thats about it I guess. And here’s the summary. In terms of good things and things that need improvement.
The good things
The Yogi Index. It is a brilliant idea. It helps me save time because I dont have to read long pieces of texts or browse through multiple websites. Its like that star rating that often decides the future of a movie on the box office. However, having said that I would love to see Yogi Index include ratings (on price vs value) from the members. May be a weighted average or something (50% weight to editor’s rating and 50% to reviewers and mode reviews you have, higher your weight). A great feature none the less and has immense potential.
The shortlisting and comparison. Awesome feature. Shortlisting was intuitive and its a neat little effect to see that phone getting added to the list at the bottom right. So much so that I actually played with the list for some time before I resumed my search and shortlisting. Comparison also works well.
The good and the bad on the product page. This is probably written by an editor manually for each product. While I can create an algorithm for everything, I can never replace human intelligence. And this is what helped me shortlist the phone I want to buy. To me is the winning combination – someone gathering all the
data points and then adding a layer of opinion on top of results. How I
wish search in general was like that (remember Mahalo.com in its earlier avatar?).
Things that need improvement / suggestions
A better “feature”search, as explained above.
There is a feature score in place for each product. Ideally I should be able to filter my choices on this feature score and Yogi Index. Right now, I can merely do a sort on this data. This would help establish credibility and reach of the two numbers that FindYogi “owns” (everything else is “owned” by the brand). If I can start popularizing these numbers, I can sell this data to brands. I guess this is more to do with marketing, rather than anything else.
What if apart from just the price, FindYogi also had a store rating (they may
have to gather this data from their users, dont know how though), it
would help as well. The price difference in the phones category across
merchants can’t really be a lot and if there were a rating, I would
rather pay some more money to buy from a reliable place. But then it may be just me?
The End Note
FindYogi is brilliant with their focus on user experience and
convenience. As a customer I would love to use it and recommend.
Do check it out when you want to shop for a phone or a tablet.
However, they need to do a couple of things before I become a devout
convert. Hope I get to see those soon!
Disclaimer Naman, co-founder at FindYogi, is a good friend and advices me often on my startup ideas. And yet this post is in no way biased.
Note. Starting now, every now and then, I shall try and post review of few start ups
ideas that catch my fancy. I used to do this a few years back and it helped immensely to
structure my thoughts better. Now that I have time, I want to restart this and exercising my grey matter.
Of all the ads that are on TV, because of the sheer number and the frequency with which they bombard you, very few catch you eye, your attention and make you take note of what is happening on the screen. The new TVC for Chevrolet Cruze is one such commercial.
Unlike most great ads, its not a one minuter and there are no powerful characters or dialogues. Its a very simple ad that has just one hero – the product itself. And unlike all car ads, there are no cliched stories and it does not talk overtly about the power, mileage, young adult protagonist or the awesome looks of the car.
Have a look, if you haven’t seen already.
The lyrics go as follow…
Run boy run there’s a storm on the run… dust… rising! There’s a beast on the prowl, there’s a roar, there’s a growl… thunder and lightning!
Wow! Beautiful visuals, amazing lyrics, awesome voice and great music. A brilliant package. There is no way that the target audience for Cruze will not like it.
Talking about the target audience, for any car company, typically the key sets of audience are…
Potential customers – the ones who are actually considering buying a sedan that is high on comfort, value for money and stylish enough for them to buy it. The car must elevate their status within their heads and more importantly, in their peer group. For a prospective Cruze customer, I am assuming, from the commercial, that they are looking at selling it to fast rising corporate kinds rather than the old businessmen. These young men want to play, rather than just commute in comfort. For “play”, the hunter and prowl is a brilliant place to be at.
The automotive fanatics – the kind of people who know what horsepower the engine is, what is the turning radius, the clearance and other such things that are Greek and Latin to people like us. These people participate in forums and post their opinion on portals. These are the people that potential customers actually turn towards for their buy decision. Even though, the commercial has zero stats or numbers, it has everything that would make a car fanatic take note. The drifts and looks will make one search for more. The Cruze website does an ok job at it.
Dealers/sales team etc – the ones who will actually sell the car. These people are often oblivious to the content of the ad but need the gratification that the “company” is advertising on TV and is spending money to help sell easier.
Competitors – merely to take a jab at em ;P
The ad clearly does a good job at appealing at all 4. Even though, it would be tough to get the sales data just for Cruze but it would be interesting to see. At least in this category, premium sedan category, there must be a direct correlation between advertisement and sales. Since in India, a car is a very very high involvement product, its really important for a car commercial to appeal to emotions.
In terms of how a planner would have approached this TVC, a typical planner is trained to think in two dimensions – rational and emotional. Rational – you talk of the benefits that are apparent, measurable and verifiable. Examples could be better mileage, superior looks, impeccable build quality or extra space. Emotional – you talk of benefits that a customer will perceive after they are exposed to your communication and hence are non-quantifiable, subjective and open to interpretation. The examples could be “makes you a hero”, “takes you home”, “your first car” etc. The rational ones are easy to make and the emotional ones are difficult to pull off. This commercial is definitely not rational and slightly evolved for classifying as purely emotional.
For the category, the commercial is spot on. Easily breaks the clutter and makes the audience take a note. Take a note of the hunter on prowl! In the end, its a #win commercial for Chevrolet. Kudos to the agency that came up with the insight and wrote this commercial (who?). And to the client that approved the concept and is actually spending money to air it.
I’d rate the commercial a 4 on 5. Go see it. And yes, it makes me want to go and buy the car. Just that I dont have the money to do so. Sigh!
